Paternity Leave - more than just a 2 week scive. (Maternity/Paternity Leave)

Member Name: The Daz

Product:	Maternity/Paternity Leave
Date:	04/03/09 (159 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Important bonding and task-filled time.

Disadvantages: Low paid, exclusions apply, limited period.

Eek! It's a baby. It writhes, it cries, it smells funny... I've changed my mind!

Ok - so these are fairly stereotypical musings on your first few seconds as a new dad when the nurse hands you the bundle of blankets containing your small and wrinkly offspring. I was prepared for the birth - especially as it was 2 weeks late, but not the method of arrival. The sprog clearly has its Mum's sense of direction and pottered about aimlessly until deciding to head for the largest exit.

I shall spare you all the emotional wibble now, it'll only embarrass me and other dads who need to pretend they coped fine, but in reality had to choke back the tears. Awww.

Regarding Paternity Leave - it really is necessary to take it straight after the birth. So much is unknown about how your child will act and need caring for. You can't just assume that they will kip when tired and feed at regular intervals. It's rather more akin to playing 20 questions with a drunk person - you never know what will come out next!

I spent most of those first two weeks backwards and forwards to Hospital, and became the rational person in charge, having to care for a poorly wife and a confused baby. I really didn't know much more than the healthcare professionals were telling me, and what I had learned at the excellent NCT classes and from all the books I had submersed myself in as I proudly watched my wife swell with magic baby goings on.

Your main role as a male partner during Paternity Leave is to fetch, carry, feed the mother, take away the nappies, nip to the shop for things you've forgotten, reassure and cuddle your partner, help calm a crying baby, fend off the attentions of in-laws, parents and assorted friends when you think your partner has reached their limit of politeness, and any ad hoc duties not mentioned. A bit like your job title at work really!

Don't forget to email/phone your boss so they can fill out a card and buy a pressie for your new child (the more free gifts the better....), or to turn off your alarm clock. You won't need it until your child/ren go to University and you actually rediscover that magical term: Lie-in.

Right - onto the technical bits of your leave. You may wish to continue playing the Lotto.

Current allowances: 2 weeks paid leave, provided you have worked for your current employer for 26 weeks before the 15th week before the due date. This means that if, like me, you start a new job after your partner has conceived, you won't be entitled to any Paternity Leave at all.
The payment for Paternity Leave is the same as for Statutory Maternity Pay that your partner will get - and rises slowly each year. In 2008/9 it was roughly £110 a week, or your weekly salary, whichever is lower. Generous is not the term I would use to describe HM Treasury.

You may also take up to 4 weeks in any year, to a total of 13 weeks, during the time before your child reaches the age of 6. This is unpaid leave however, so a lot of parents don't use all, if much of this allowance.

Luckily for me - and after some wheedling and looking keen - I was able to use one week of my holiday allowance and take one week's unpaid leave in lieu of Paternity Leave. Financially it was a struggle, but I felt it necessary not to let my wife and child suffer just because the government is under the thumb of CBI whining about costs and to scared to allocate Taxes fairly to benefit society.

I don't want to start a whole argument about parents versus non-parents, but having been both at some point I can see why the division occurs. Children are a drain on Tax Revenue, but are by necessity, our future Pension providers, and so a balance does need to be struck in terms of encouraging or even simply allowing adults to afford to have children.

Overall, the UK has the worst Paternity and Maternity allowances in Europe. In Scandinavian nations you can even share the leave with your partner - so that you can both take turns to have months off work and even out the burden of early childcare. Thoughtful eh? We'll never have any of that though will we - it's all about the cost to business - which is why we also have the fewest Bank Holidays of any EU nation.

Alternatively - quit your job, lie about your savings and your bad back, and claim all the benefits under the sun. It appears to work for a substantial number of people thesedays.

Emigration anyone? I could always set up as an agent....

Summary: A necessity sadly undervalued.