Maybe baby (Miscarriage in general)

Member Name: dibuzz

Product:	Miscarriage in general
Date:	07/08/01 (88 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: n/a

Disadvantages: distressing for all concerned

I wasn't even trying for a baby when I got pregnant with my first baby. Everything was great and I thought it was so easy.

He was 13 months old when I became pregnant again which surprised me as I was still breastfeeding him.

10 weeks later I had a strange dragging feeling in my abdomen and put it down to running after a lively toddler. The next day however I began to bleed and my husband called the doctor who against my wishes gave me an internal examination assuring me it would make no difference to whether I lost the baby or not.

The next morning I woke up covered in blood and was taken to hospital. The young doctor who examined me was very kind and patient and explained that I would need a D+C to clear out any remaining tissue.

This was early in the morning and I was admitted to a ward in the maternity unit. This was supposed to be seperate but you could hear babies crying all the time although you couldn't see them.

The worst part for me though was the fact that one other girl had suffered a miscarriage but the others were in for abortions. How insensitive can you get?

I had to wait until early evening for my operation and stay in overnight. It was strange walking out the next day with all the others who had been released as I was the only one with empty arms.

I then had to get through the stage of meeting people who were unaware I had lost the baby and having to tell them.

The time he/she would have been born was very difficult.

I went on to have another son, again without any problems and thought maybe the other one was a girl.

Two years after this we decided we wanted another baby but at 10 weeks I began to bleed slightly. I was devastated and went straight to bed, although I have heard that this makes no difference.I continued to lose a small amount of pink blood and convinced myself that if it stayed pink I would be OK.
Luckily I was right and after taking
it easy for a few days I went right up to 41 weeks and had a beautiful daughter.

We were delighted to find I was pregnant 16 months later as we wanted a large family and I got past the magic 12 week stage where you start to relax a little. Two weeks later I was in town with my 3 children when I felt odd. As I lifted my daughter's buggy into the car I felt a pull and sudden wetness. I drove straight to the hospital as it was only 10 minutes away and was taken into casualty where they phoned my husband.

Two hours later my husband arrived (he had been at a meeting and no-one could find him) to find me still in the waiting room sitting in a wheelchair and dripping blood onto the floor. My 18 month old daughter was asleep on the floor at my feet and I couldn't even reach her. My sons were by this time both afraid and bored and getiing dirty looks as they were getting whiney and crying.

My husband made a big fuss and suddenly there was a doctor free to see me. After not even examining me he informed me that I couldn't have a scan as no staff are in to do this on a Saturday but if I came back on Monday they would tell me if the baby was still alive. I'm sure you can imagine my reaction to this (not to mention my husband's). We went home and I spent the weekend in bed just hoping, afraid to move.

On the Monday we went back to a special clinic for this sort of problem and I had a scan. As the nurse found the baby her first words were "baby's alive and strong". I cried so much with relief that she had to stop for a while but she was really kind and reassured me all the time. It turned out that my placenta was tearing and there was nothing to be done apart from be careful and hope but this was so different to the treatment we got in casualty that I could have kissed her. We were told to come back if we were worried at any time which we did a few times and were always dealt with straight away.

We we
re given a date after which the baby would be strong enough to survive as he wouldn't make it to full term.He was also going to be very small. After all the scans we knew it was a boy which surprised me as I was sure it would be a girl.

This date came and went and so did the next month. In fact my due date passed and my 8lb 3oz (small?) boy was born 2 weeks late.

I was in slow labour for 2 weeks and he kept us on edge until the very end. The day he was born I woke up and couldn't feel him move but he must have just been deeply asleep - a problem he doesn't seem to have now.

Although I realise that it is a difficult subject and some peole don't know how to react, I feel that people in the healthcare profession should have specialist training in how to deal with miscarriage. There should also be provision for a separate ward away from both new mothers and girls who are getting rid of the vey thing we are trying to hold on to.

Summary: