Mum's the Word! (Older Mothers in general)

Member Name: jayjolynn

Product:	Older Mothers in general
Date:	07/12/06 (751 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Lots!

Disadvantages: None

I am writing this review as someone who had an 'older' Mum!

My Mum had us (when I say us, I mean I have a twin) when she was 40, and I suppose in these years back then, and no contraception, it was a 'hit or miss' whether you fell pregnant or not! Let's just say my Mother had a very nasty shock when she realised not only was she pregnant, she was pregnant with twins at the ripe old age of 40!
She had already had one son, who she had had at 19, and another, (who had died when 2 years old) and we had an older Sister of 5 years!
She had been warned that there were risks at her age, and of course the risks doubled with her having twins!

My Mother in later life, told me that she had been terrified of having us at that age, and especially twins, as she thought she could never have coped with us. All her family lived down South, so she had no one to help her with this unexpected 'double act'!
She did get a little more help than some Mothers and as she had twins, we jumped the queue in the Nursery class, so that Mum could get some quiet time to herself for a couple of hours a day!

I cannot remember anytime, in my childhood years, thinking that my Mum was older, until perhaps we got into teenage years, and probably only then because she had white hair (probably due to the shock of having twins when she was 40!)! She never once dyed her hair, and never tried to look younger, all she did was act younger, and that came naturally to her!

She would take us on picnics and to the fun fair, where she was always the first to get on the rides, and sit us on her knee, re-assuring us that she would hold us tight, so we wouldn't fall off! She never tired of playing 'ball' with us, or joining in with our yoyo competitions, and hoola hoop contests (which she was a champion at)!

She had a young mind, and joined in with all my friends, and even when we were in teenage years, she loved to dance along with us to the latest 'pop' music!
I remember my Mum sneaking in the back door with us to watch Cliff Richard (what was I thinking of!)
She loved him, and was so excited at managing to slip all three of us (my Sis, me and Mum) in for the end of the show, just to catch a glimpse of her idol! She had tried desperately to get tickets for this show but they were all sold out, but she had managed to talk kindly to a doorman (or perhaps she slipped him a fiver???) She sang along with Cliff for the last 20 minutes of his show, and when we got home, she promptly put on one of his records and we all danced to the music for about an hour before chasing us to bed!

When she was about 55, we were fortunate enough to get the opportunity to see the Beatles in concert, as my Sis happened to be engaged to the Manager of the venue at the time, and yes, Mum was there too! Yes, she embarrassed us by throwing roses onto the stage! She was screaming louder than most of the teenagers, and trying to push past everyone so her girls could get a better view of these idols!
We saw the Walker brothers, Freddie and The Dreamers, Hermits Hermits & Gerry & The Pacemakers (does anyone remember them?)!
ha....I really am giving my age away here, but all these groups I went to see when I was a young teenager, was all down to my Mum being a young at heart 'older' Mum!

She was also a strict Mother too, and we had to earn our good times! If we misbehaved she would punish us by not taking us to a promised outing. She kept to her threats too, so we quickly learned what we would lose out on,should we be naughty!

Looking back now, I do realise she must have tired quicker than perhaps a younger Mum might have, but I can't honestly say she showed it, and in fact I would say, she appeared to have more energy than us at times!

One thing we missed out on through our childhood was having our Mum read to us, but this had nothing to do with age, it was because she was registered blind, and only had very limited sight. I used to tease her saying, that her sight may be selective, as she managed to see her favourite singers when she wanted to!
She would sometimes get childrens books,in Braille to try and read them to us, though this was very seldom as there weren't many of these books about then. My Dad did most of the reading to us though, so we never missed out that much!

Even with my Mothers partial sight, (she hid that well too), she never let it stop her doing anything. The only thing was we would have to read letters to her, or the daily papers, and sometimes we had to tell her when to stop, while pouring boiling water into a cup, as she had to put her finger over the edge, so she could feel when the water was reaching the top (many burnt fingers!)!
All this had nothing to do with her being an 'older' Mum though.

She loved all our young years, and even when it was our turn to treat her, we took her to many concerts, and I never once felt uncomfortable having an 'older' Mum!! All through our childhood, we thought we had a playmate, and through teenage years, we had a best friend in our Mum!

She would of course embarrass us on more than one occasion!
When I was in my late twenties (putting Mum in her late sixties) we took her to see Tony Christie, one of her favourites. He was past his hay day at this time, and was playing at a local venue, but we had a great night with him singing alot of his oldies. After the show, he said should anyone want an autograph, come backstage and he will oblige! Well, I thought, no way, am I acting like a groupie! Nope, not my Mum!!

My friends found this hilarious, my Mother joining the queue with the younger girls to get his autograph (on her shoulder, I may add)! Tony himself found this amusing too, and sung her one line from his song into her ear, then pecked her on the cheek, and she naughtily told him she would never wash again for a life time!
I could only wish the ground would open up and swallow me!

She used to say, 'Oh I wish I had been younger having you, so I could keep up!' I never knew what she meant by that statement as she always 'kept up' with us! She was not an 'old' Mum by any standard! She, later on, in my life, would say, she was shocked by falling pregnant with us, and how she wished she had been younger to cope with us! Oh, if she thought she hadn't coped with us as well as she would have in her 20's then, all I can say is, it would have been awesome should she have had us in her younger years!

No, there's nothing wrong with being an 'older' Mum! I had some fabulous times with my Mum as I was growing up, and even now my own kids laugh at the times their Nana had danced with them round the room to the tunes of Jason Donovan and Kylie! She used to ask the kids to tape her the 'New Kids on the Block' record, and at Christmas, would buy them the 'Now' album, and then ask them to tape a copy for her!

She used to have 'sleep overs' for my girls and their friends, at her house. She was into her late seventies then, but never lost her sense of fun!
She just loved the teenage scene and all my friends, and later, my daughters friends grew to love her for her youthful outlook!

I am so privileged to have had a Mum who was older, yet with an outlook of never wanting to grow old gracefully! It is all how you perceive 'old'!?
She had alot of wisdom too, and would tell us about her upbringing, and how she was brought up to know 'right' from 'wrong' and how she carried it through when bringing us up!

I was fortunate though, my Mum lived till she was 88! I had my Mum long enough to know that she would never ever be classed as an older Mum! Right up till the time she fell ill, and subsequently passed away, she will always be a young Mum in our minds!!

I wonder what is an 'older' Mum? You can be a 40 year old Mum with a young attitude, or a young Mum with an irresponible attitude!

I do realise that being an 'older' Mum, can have its disadvantages, as if you have a child at 40, your child reaches teenage years, and you are approaching your sixties. That child may have to endure the agonies of a parent dying or indeed their parent having poor health. Such alot for a young teenager to deal with!

....My Mum never suffered poor health right up until, sadly, Dementia had taken her from us! Indeed, it never crossed my mind that I had had an 'older' Mum, and even when she came to the end of her life, I would never think of her as 'older'!!

It's her birthday today, and she would have been 92! I can still see her dancing around the floor with Tony Christies music blasting out, should she still be here!

I had a Mum who was 'young' in every respect and only her birth certificate contradicted that!!

Summary: Keep young at heart!