Kids yes, babies no! (Parenting in general)

Member Name: superbird

Product:	Parenting in general
Date:	27/06/02 (29 review reads)
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It seems weird to be writing here when I'm ten years at least off doing the parenting thing but I thought it might be interesting to raise this.

I like children a lot and I've done quite a bit of volunteering with them in my time, however I have zero interest in babies. I don't think I'm mentally strong enough to look after one and lets face it, in every family I've known the woman has done the vast majority of looking after their babies and toddlers. I have a history of clinical depression anyway and in addition most of the women in my family have suffered from post-natal depression. I have a horrible feeling that either the baby would end up dead or I would.

What I want basically is to take on the traditional "daddy" role! I'm certainly not going to ignore the poor kid if I ever do give birth but I will definitely not be taking any more maternity leave than it takes for me to recover physically and I doubt I'll be getting up the most in the night either.

I think it evens out in the end anyway. My mother did most of the work with me when I was tiny but my dad was far better at dealing with teenage tantrums and all that so he got the charming task of dealing with a gobby daughter. If my boyfriend and I had that sort of relationship in reverse with the child then I think we'd be very happy.

Either that, or we'll adopt an older child because most couples who adopt want babies and the rest of the kids get left on the shelf! I'd actually prefer adopting because I think there are far too many unwanted kids in the world but my boyfriend wants one of his own which I can understand.

I guess lots of people may think I'm selfish for my views on this but I can't imagine that a child would be better off with an unhappy mother than a fulfilled father.

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