Wait nine months.....then p-u-u-u-u-s-h! (Preparing for Birth)

Member Name: jo1976

Product:	Preparing for Birth
Date:	05/01/09 (162 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Suggestions of how to prepare for the birth and to becoming a parent

Disadvantages: Everybody has different ways of dealing with things. This might not be your way.

Firstly, congratulations to anybody reading this who is about to become a parent for the first time. It is probably the most difficult but amazing experience of your life (and I'm talking about parenthood as a whole, not childbirth - that's the easy part!)

In many ways, the whole process of giving birth and becoming a parent isn't actually something that you can really be prepared for. You won't be prepared for the physical pain (labour hurts, it really hurts!), nor the strength of your own emotions when you finally start to bond with your new baby (whether that be immediately after birth or a few days later). When that moment comes, it will totally blow you away with its intensity and you know that everything you have been through was worth it. Having said that, a bit of preparation can't go amiss. Here are some of my tips based on my own personal experience. Feel free to accept those that you like the sound of and ignore those that you don't. Everybody is their own person and we all have different beliefs and ways of tackling things.


1. Physical Preparation

I'll get this over with early as it can be a bit gory thinking about your own body and what it goes through during pregnancy and labour.

From the moment you realise you are pregnant, I'd recommend massaging some sort of oil or cream into what was your flat belly and eventually becomes your bump. Health professionals do say that it doesn't actually make any difference to whether you get stretch marks or not, but it does make you feel good to be spending time pampering your own body, if nothing else. I've seen several reviews on here recommending Bio-Oil. I used a Boots own brand massage cream and ended up with lots of stretch marks from around week 36, so make of that what you will.

Pelvic floor exercises! I confess, I didn't do these and I thought you only had to do them whilst you are pregnant but, in fact, you're supposed to do these every day for the rest of your life after you've had a baby. Oops - that probably explains why I literally PMSL when I read funny reviews! If you can get into a regular routine whilst you're pregnant, it will probably make you more likely to continue after the birth and keep everything working properly down below.

Midwives also recommend perineal massage in the last few weeks before your due date. This is supposed to stretch the area between your two main orifices (sorry!) and make it more flexible - ideal for giving birth. In antenatal classes, it was even suggested that your other half could do the massage down there for you! I'm sorry - but the mere thought of my other half firkling away down below at 8 months' pregnant made me feel queasy. Then again, I did need episiotomies with both births so there may be some benefits to doing this, if you can face it.

I would also recommend drinking Raspberry Leaf Tea as this is reputed to speed up the labour process and encourage the baby arrive closer to their due date rather than later. In fact, it can be so strong and effective that pregnant women are advised not to start drinking it (or taking it in tablet form) until about 32 weeks into pregnancy. (Double check with your midwife as medical advice does change over time.) I took it from about 34 weeks into both my pregnancies. Whilst I can't say that it made the labours any shorter, both babies did arrive before their due dates (but not prematurely) so it avoided the horror of going past the 'date'. Raspberry Leaf tea-bags or tablets can be picked up from most health food shops.


2. Mental Preparation

By this I mean arm yourself with as much information about pregnancy, labour and early parenthood as you can digest but also be prepared to disregard a great chunk of it too. Ante-natal classes are invaluable. I'd recommend the NCT ones but any that you (and preferably your partner) can go to will be useful. Also try to have a good relationship with your community midwife and make sure you ask her questions about anything that you're not sure about. Don't worry about looking silly, they will have heard it all before.

You will be encouraged to draw up a Birth Plan as you get closer to the birth. This can be useful as it gives you the chance to consider some of the pain relief options available. Don't be too rigid on the specifics of the plan as you might have to rethink your options midway through your labour. I've gone through one labour without pain relief but there are no prizes for doing so!


3. Emotional Preparation

This can be by invloving your partner in the whole pregnancy experience (as men can get sidelined) and trying to make sure that your relationship is as strong as it can be - as pregnancy and parenthood can place a great strain on your relationship. Try to make as much time for each other whilst you're pregnant as time for you as a couple will be in very short supply once baby arrives.

Also try to make time to socialise (without the heavy drinking!) and catch up with old friends and relatives as you might not be in a position to be travelling or partying for a while. (I'm not trying to paint a really bleak picture of motherhood. It's just that your priorities and your focus will change once you have a baby, so it's nice to make the most of being just 'you' before you become 'Mummy' for ever!)


4. Practical Preparation

Try to buy any major purchases between the 3 month - 6 month period, as you won't feel like traipsing around shops when you're in the final trimester. You'll just want to be at home with your feet up. Alternatively, order big items online but get them set up well in advance of baby's expected arrival. Also practice setting up and using items like car seats, pushchair and baby slings etc.

Don't leave organising the baby's nursery until the last minute either - particularly if it needs painting, as some paints should be avoided whilst pregnant because of the toxins in them.


5. Financial Preparation

Having a baby can place a lot of pressure on your finances, particularly as you will most probably be losing a salary and adjusting to living on one wage! It's easy to get carried away with all the 'essentials' that a new baby must have. It's worth remembering that babies actually need relatively little. Draw up a list of the real essentials and set a realistic budget and stick to it. You will often find that relatives and friends will be more than happy to buy some of the major purchases as presents for the new baby and you might be offered lots of stuff from other parents. Don't turn anything down - just because it's been used before doesn't mean that it won't be worth having.

Also, have a look at your day-to-day outgoings and do those things that you've always meant to get around to - switch utility companies, change broadband providers, use cashback sites for any major purchases, cut back on those cappuccinos whilst in town etc, etc. If you can reduce your outgoings before the birth, it will help to ease the pressure once little one arrives.

Lastly....


6. Relax

Try to make time for yourself whilst you're pregnant. So much attention will be on your baby and your new role as a mother, that it's easy to neglect your own needs. Get your hair done at least a few weeks before you're due to give birth (as both my two arrived early.)

Don't rush about trying to get everything organised and feel that you have to be the best parent in the world. As for the birth - that baby will come out whether you're prepared or not! All your baby needs is a parent who loves him or her and tries their best to care for them. You'll do that bit easily, no worries. xxx

Summary: Good luck xxx