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Preparing for Pregnancy

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      26.01.2010 14:08
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      You will never be the same again...!

      I was so foolish. Married as a mere 19 year old girl and pregnant 6 months later. The pregnancy was planned and I was SO excited to become a mother. I did all the things I read about planning for pregnancy:

      -Take prenatal vitimins 3 months before you plan to concieve (and continue to take these vitimins during your pregnancy and whilst breastfeeding)
      - Maintain a healthy diet (they also said stuff like, eat breakfast cereal if you want a boy and citrus and fruits if want a girl - female sperms thrive in a acid environment and male sperm thrive in an alkaline environment)
      - Excercise well
      - Read up all you can about pregnancy

      Well I did all those things but oh boy - once I fell pregnant, I had NO IDEA what I was getting myself in for!!!

      BEFORE you get pregnant, get the two following books:

      -The Blokes Guide to Pregnancy
      -What to Expect When you're Expecting

      They're the best books out there for information and a bit of reality. It is always good to follow some YouTube.com women who documentate their pregnancies for some perspective.

      I'm currently working on a book called "Pregnancy Is Not An Illness, but Hyperemesis Is" - when that's finished, I'll self-publish it and reccommend you read that too.

      Thing is, there are SO many things they don't tell you about pregnancy! Here's a few things to expect when you're expecting: (Taken from my blog while I was pregnant and overdue! LOL)

      1. Insomnia - I'm exhausted, but I can't sleep!
      2. Frequent Bathroom Trips - Baby's weight and pressure builds every day
      3. Migranes - Dehydration? Tiredness? Hormones?
      4. Nausea - Return of the sickness!
      5. SPD - the YEOUCH I just tried to lift my leg and really regret it!
      6. Period Cramps - Braxton Hicks
      7. Intense Back pain - from baby lying back to back
      8. Bruised Ribs - from baby's feet
      9. Inflamed uterus - from constant kicking
      10. Sciatica - Can I say? "Ouch!"
      11. Leaking colostrum - Oh no! I was supposed to feed my baby with that! and....eww!
      12. Poking out tummy button - Baby, stop playing with it!!
      13. Alien baby visuals - Wow, an impression of a foot - that was a hand...he's trying to stretch out!
      14. Absent mindedness - What was I saying again??
      15. Dizzyness and difficulty to focus - due to tiredness and lack of oxygen me thinks
      16. Deep Stretch marks -with crevices so deep they could give the Grand Canyon a run for its money!
      17. Cramps in the legs - ouch! Ouch! OUCH!
      18. Hot Flushes - *In bed: Laura: "Ross, put the fan on, it's boiling!!" - a shivering Ross sadly switches on the fan and huddles up in the duvet - 5 mins later - "Ross, it's freezing! Turn the fan off!"*
      19. Hormonal surges - Sobbing my heart out at the Persil adverts on TV
      20. Feeling and looking fat - Yes, now I can say, I'm "Big and Pregnant" but pretty soon, I'll just be Big. :(

      I suggest you go out and buy all your pregnancy clothes AT THE BEGINNING of your pregnancy because by the middle/end you'll be feeling too moody and big to walk around the shops. (Or you might feel great! But do you want to risk it?)

      You will also have some very weird looks/comments when you are pregnant. PREPARE yourself for this!

      No one tells you about the hormones either. You will/might turn into a mental crazy woman. (I cried my eyes out just watching a bin fall over)

      Make decisions NOW while you can think rationally. Think about things like:

      Do you want to have the test for Downs Syndrome?
      Are you willing to accept internal examinations?
      Do you want a hospital birth or a home birth?
      What do you expect from the medical staff?
      What do you expect from your partner? (during the pregnancy/birth)
      Will you find out the sex of the baby?

      I think it's nearly impossible to properly prepare for pregnancy unless you've already been through it - simply because every pregnancy is different and you just don't know what you need to be prepared for. I came down with a rare illness for example. It's absolutely vital to prepare for anything.

      And then when you do get pregnant - try to enjoy the journey! The BEST things about pregnancy are feeling that baby kick for the first time and seeing him/her on the sonogram!! Aww.

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        13.01.2010 09:07
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        Any medication should be taken only after consultation...

        While I was reading a medical journal I came across an extensive article about the use of drugs during pregnancy and a few cardinal rules for drugs to be taken during pregnancy..

        According to this article, Right upto World war 2 , most obstricians were of the opinion that if you looked after the mother the baby in the womb would look after itself. This complacency was jolted in the forties when subsequent experiments proved that a foetus is extremely vulnerable to commonly and sometimes carelessly precribed medicines during pregnancy as well as to many noxious influences like smoking, drinking alcohol and drug abuse by the mother.

        A pregnancy lasting nine months is divided into 3 trimesters of three months each. During the First trimester certain drugs may produce congenital malfunction, the period of the greatest risk being from the third to eleventh weeks of pregnancy.Care should be taken during that period .

        During the second and third trimesters certain drugs may affect the growth and the functional development of the foetus. No drug is safe beyond all doubt in early pregnancy. So it is essential that every pregnant mother should have a basic knowledge about the drugs trhat can be harmful to herself or to her baby. It is also essntial that medication should be taken only after consulting a Gynmaecologist.

        A list of drugs to be avoided during pregnancy
        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        According to most medical practitioners and gynaecologists these are some of the drugs that need to be avoided during pregnancy

        1, Proven Teratogens - Causing deformity in foetus.
        Thalidomite - causes limb defects, deafness, congenital heart diseases etc;
        Anti tumor drugs can lead to abortion and skeletal defects in the foetus.They are to be avoided at all cost unless it is absolutely essential for the pregnant woman, supervised by physicians.

        2, Analgesics
        Aspirins and Analgesic powders are known to cause Anaemia , post- partum haemorrhage, prolonged gestation etc;

        3, Anticoagulants such as Warfarn and Heparin can cause foetal mortality.

        4, Anti microbials like tetracyclinews, Aminoglycosides and Sulphonamides cause nerve deafness and reversible effect on skeletal growth in prematures. This is another drug that should be taken strictly under medical supervision.

        5, Antimalarial drugs like Qunine ,Pentaquin or Chloroquine is known to have caused abortion or congenital deafness in many cases...

        6, Antithyroid drugs like Iodides , Radioactive iodine, Thiouracils may cause foetal goitre or destoy foetal thyroid...

        7, Cardiac preparations like Pro pranolol can cause Intrauterine growth retardation in the foetus.

        8, Streroids like Betnelan, Betnesol, Wysalone, Cortisone, Androgen etc; can cause Masculization in female foetus and other mal functions. They can also harm the pregnant woman . There have been cases where these drugs have adversely affected the heart condition and blood pressure of the preganant woman.

        9, Vaccines like Rubella, Measles and Yellow fever contain live virus which crosses Placenta.. These vaccines are to be completely avoided during pregnancy.

        A few Cardinal rules drawn up by the medical fraternity regarding drugs taken during pregnancy :-


        1, Drugs should be taken when prescribed during pregnancy only if the expected benefit to the mother is thought to be greater than the risk to the foetus.

        2, " A pill for every ill " is an unsafe policy , and is to be avoided despite all temptations to provide instant relief. It is never a wise idea to take any drugs without consulting the doctor.

        3, During the first trimester all drugs should be avoided as far as possible .

        4, Medicines which have been extensively used in pregnancy and are known to be safe should only be prescribed by the doctor and taken by the pregnant woman.

        5, When taking certain medication becomes necessary for a pregnant woman ,it is better to take the smallest effective dose of the medicine/drug prescribed .
        6, In case of any side effects the doctor should be immediately consulted instead of waiting .

        According to Gynaecologists any medication even if it is safe or have minimal risk , should be discussed with your physician prior to taking . Most medications fall into the "unknown category" which means that there is no documentation of its safety during pregnancy, so it is best to consult a physician or a gynaecologist and make sure that there is no adverse effect ..

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          06.10.2009 00:12
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          A brilliant experience

          Pregnancy.
          Such a lovely topic, really it is. It's funny how the day you find out you're pregnant can be the best day of your life, or the worst news ever, but either way, that baby inside of you, or foetus rather, or group of cells?, deserves to be nurtured and get the best start in life possible.

          When I found out I was pregnant wit my son, 3 years ago now, I remember my midwife going through the routing "you can't eat this and this and those!" and she said shark. I thought what?! I can't eat shark? Well dam, I'll have to get something else in for the tea. That really did make me laugh.

          As for alcohol during pregnancy, you're allowed to drink about a glass or two a week I think, but experts don't really know how much is safe for you to drink, and at the end of the day, for the sake of a bit of wine or vodka, I wouldn't put my baby at risk and wouldn't be willing to sacrifice their health or even life, so I didn't drink anything throughout either of my pregnancies. Go onto Google and search for 'foetal alcohol syndrome'. It is shocking some of the effects that alcohol can have your unborn babies, I didn't realise it was so bad, but it certainly put me of drinking anything.

          Now, everyone will have different opinions about vitamins and tablets, but I never took any supplements during my pregnancies and I gave birth to two healthy bouncing babies, both of which were good weights. To be honest, unless a doctor recommends that you need them to help the baby because you're lacking something like a vitamin, then I wouldn't bother. I'd save the time and money because I don't really think you need them.

          Smoking during pregnancy is never fondly looked upon, but I've smoked for 20 years now, I know it isn't good, but through my pregnancies, although I cut down to about 10 a day, I never quit. Neither of my children have lung problems or breathing difficulties and as I said earlier, bother were very healthy babies, so I personally didn't see the problem caused by having a few ciggies, but in saying that, I wouldn't smoke my usual 20 a day or any more than that, because I did feel bad smoking excessivly.

          When trying to get pregnant, I obviously stopped taking precautions with my husband and made sure that we were emotionally and financially stable for a baby. I didn't want a child I couldn't afford. I didn't do anything special, I just had more ermm, nookie?

          I love being pregnant and feeling my baby moving and growing inside me both times, my biggest advice is to take it easy and try to avoid silly things like falls by wearing suitable footwear, no more 6 inch heels! Because a fall in pregnancy can be devastating. Also, cut down on your caffeine intake which is what my midwife told me to do.

          Overall, pregnancy is a wonderful experience with some lovely raging hormones and changes to your body. It had me in laughter and tears for about 6 months but it is all worth it in the end. !

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            04.05.2009 01:16
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            I can't wait.

            Well as I have said in a few of my reviews and ops recently, me and my husband have decided to start trying for our first baby. Its come after we have been married almost a year. My husband was dead set against having children this time last year, but over the last few months, the issue has come up alot more and over the last month we have decided we are ready in our relationship and in ourselves to have a baby, we have discussed everything through the changes which will take place and the differences to our lives, and we are confident that although it will be tough, that the love of a child will overturn every sleepless night and dirty nappy.

            And so, 3 days ago we decided that I would come off my Mini-Pill contraception, and start trying to conceive and so thats what we have done.

            I read that after you come off the pill, it can take a few weeks, months for your body to get back to normal and that conceiving can be difficult. But I am hoping that everything will go ok, and that in the next couple of weeks I will be taking a positive test...probably very naive of me to think that it would happen so quickly! Tends to be the ones who want a baby will try and try but the unplanned ones come along on that one night you forgot to take your pill!

            I have an older sister who has three babies, and I was there the whole way through her pregnancies so I feel I am quite clued up on it all...at least I hope so...!

            I know that folic acid is very important to help stop miscarriges and illnesses like Spina Bifida in baby, and so its somethign I am getting in the next couple of days to take throughout conception through to around 12 weeks pregnancy.

            I know about what I'm not suposed to eat:

            Some cheeses (blue cheese, some brie and camemburg)
            Pate
            raw meat
            unpasteurised milk
            raw eggs (i.e. homemade mayonaise)
            liver and liver related products
            Oily fish

            And I should limit my caffeine and alcohol intake...
            of course alcohol should be near enough cut out of my diet once pregnant, but I know that something like 1 unit every so often is no danger, and there are debates as to whether there is any danger to babies, its difficult to kno what to do there!!!

            Other than this, I am kind of flummoxed, I am excited about getting pregnant and giving birth, and I already have a book on order from amazon about conception, pregnancy and birth, and so I am looking forward to reading all about it, and hopefully getting myself knowing everything!!!!

            Its the after birth sex I'm worried about...! I have read it can dry up completely!!! :-o lol!!!!!

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              08.02.2009 02:35
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              enjoy it

              A lot of people dont realy get the chance to prepare for pregnancy but due to the fact that my baby is the result of artificial incermination i had a lot more opertunity to preparefor this than other mums to be.

              During your pregnancy you want to be as healthy as possible to give your baby the best chance of being healthy as it can have, i began this by eating a lot more healthy foods than i normaly would have done and adding a lot of iron and folic acid rich foods to my diet aswell as taking folic acid tablets for 3 months before we began trying to concieve as this helps to prevent spina bifida and other neural tube defects, you need to continue these for the first 3 months of the pregnancy too.

              Along with this i gave up drinking alcohol completely as i know that some claim it has no effect if you only drink a couple of units a week wholst pregnant but i wasnt taking any chances with this if i could avoid it althogether.

              I have tryed to give up smoking with all 3 of my pregnancys without any luck and came to the conclusion that for me i would just cut it down and keep it to around 6 cigarettes a day as this surely has to be better for me and the baby than me being constantly stressed which is something you realy want to avoid wholst pregnant as you dont want your blood pressure to get too high,

              I managed to escape the last two pregnancys with very few stretch marks and with significantly less than other women i know, i am hopeing to escape them again this time by doing as i did then and using a greasy moisturiser each day on my stomach, chest and hips.

              Other than this my only advice would be to relax as much as possible and enjoy being pregnant as it is a wonderful experience

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                26.01.2009 18:24

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                having a little knowledge in what your body will go through is vital

                Me and my husband tried for a long time to have a baby , and the longer it took , the more we tried our best to improve our chances of conceiving. We got ourselves healthier , and fitter , and I took Folic acid ( which they recommend if you are trying for a baby ). It wasn't until my husband lost about 3 stone that we achieved our goal . I was at last pregnant. But nothing prepared me for the changes that I would go through with my body and mentally. I am pregnant now for a second time, and second time around it is better knowing what to expect. I think that the best preperation a first time mum can get is buy talking to other pregnant women or women that have had children. Every pregnancy is different, but maybe a few books would have helped me to understand first time around what was waiting for me.

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                15.07.2008 18:35
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                get in the best possible health before becoming pregnant if you can

                Both my pregnancies were planned but we didn't get much opportunity to prepare for them as I fell pregnant straight away with both my children!

                However if you are planning to fall pregnant there are a few things you can do to put you in the best possible chance of becoming pregnant and being as healthy as possible for your baby.

                Firstly try and ensure you and your partner eat a well balanced and nutritious diet, if you are overweight try to get your weight down as being overweight can hinder fertility and you also run the risk of a problmeatic pregnancy.

                Stop smoking and take a folic acic supplement before you become pregnanct and right up until the 12th week of pregnancy (although I think the advice has now been to increase this to 16 weeks, will need to check)

                Also cut down your alcohol intake and have fun!!!!

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                  15.07.2008 14:37

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                  great...where do i start, well i have been wanting to get pregnant for a while now and for the first time i missed my periods and its been 7 days today. im nervous to do the home test....dont want to be dissapointed, but i have an appointment with the doctor for next week.maybe im paying too much attention but so far;1) my nippleas are sore but only to touch2) a little nausea but nothing overwelming3) unconfortable pain between my joints between my legs and my pelvis4)loss of apetite5) frequent urination - about 3 times per hour6)sharp occassional pain in my lower abdomen and7) about two weeks ago, i noticed a tiny tiny spot on my pant but dont remember being bruised or anythingso before i make a fool of myself at the Doctors' is there a possibility of pregnancy?Help!

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                  14.06.2008 15:04
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                  Not for everyone, but just making one or two changes can help

                  The first time I got pregnant I hadn't done much planning, apart from taking folic acid and pre-conception supplements. Sadly, this pregnancy ended in miscarriage early on. But that was in no way connected to the fact that I'd not done anything about eating healthily or avoiding alcohol. It's estimated that around 1 in 5 pregnancies end in miscarriage, and most of the time no one knows why.
                  However, it left me totally devastated, and desperately wanting to get pregnant again. I wanted to do everything I possibly could to make sure I was as healthy as possible and in the best position to conceive and carry a baby to term.

                  If you're planning to try to conceive in the near future, there's a lot you can do to increase the chances of conceiving and having a safe and healthy pregnancy. Here are some tips, advice and things you can do which I learnt along my journey to pregnancy.

                  ~~ FOR HER ~~

                  * Take Folic Acid
                  If you only do one thing off this list, make sure it's this one. Taking 400mcg of folic acid daily has been shown to reduce the risk of your baby having spina bifida and other neural tube defects. Best taken at least 3 months before conception, but it's never too late to take it.

                  * Zinc
                  Zinc is an essential mineral for the reproductive system. Taking the pill can leave some women with low levels of zinc, so a supplement can help build up the levels again.

                  * Supplements
                  Taking a good quality pre-conception supplement such as Pregnacare is a good idea, as studies have shown that taking a vitamin and mineral supplement can help reduce the risk of miscarriage.

                  * Avoid caffeine
                  Caffeine has been linked to a higher risk of miscarriage and stillbirth, and can also reduce the chances of conceiving. Caffeine isn't only in coffee, but also tea, chocolate, Cola, some painkillers and medications. Try to stick to two or less cups of coffee per day, or switch to decaf.

                  * Acupuncture
                  Acupuncture has been shown to help regulate menstrual cycles and improve the chances of conceiving.

                  * Exercise
                  Being fit and healthy will certainly count in your favour when trying to conceive, and will help when pregnancy puts a huge strain on your body.


                  ~~ FOR HIM ~~

                  * Wear loose boxers
                  Avoid the tight underwear which causes too much heat to build up around the testes, thereby inhibiting the development of those little swimmers.

                  * Avoid hot baths & showers
                  Again it's the heat factor, which can reduce sperm count.

                  * Drink lots of fluids
                  You need to be well hydrated to help with sperm production, so drink lots of water and fruit juices.

                  * Vitamins and minerals
                  It's important to eat a healthy diet, with zinc being especially important for male fertility.


                  ~~ FOR BOTH OF YOU ~~

                  * Cut down on alcohol
                  As nice as it might be, alcohol is actually a poison to your body. It decreases sperm count, and can damage healthy sperm. It can also reduce your body's ability to absorb essential nutrients which are needed for healthy reproduction.
                  The official advice keeps changing, but some recommend that women cut out drinking alcohol altogether while trying to conceive. For men, binge drinking should be a big no-no, and if you're having trouble conceiving, cutting out altogether is preferable.

                  * Get nutrient levels checked
                  After my miscarriage, I was speaking to the midwife who recommended something called "Foresight." A few days later I looked it up online and found their site - http://www.foresight-preconception.org.uk/ They are a charity who run a pre-conception programme, with the aim of optimising the health of both man and woman.
                  I sent off a hair sample and cheque for £45 and in return got a report showing which minerals I was lacking and any toxic elements (aluminium, cadmium) were in my system, along with a recommendation of supplements to take. Their programme can be pretty intense and heavy going, and I didn't follow it fully. Instead I looked at the main things I was lacking in, and went out to purchase these in supplement form.
                  Some people might not want to go down this route, feeling it's too much, or not believing it works. I figured that as my midwife had recommended it, and there is research backing them up, it couldn't hurt.
                  Sanatogen now do a Pronatal His and Hers supplement, available from Boots at £12.99 for 60 tablets (1 month supply).

                  * Stop smoking
                  I shouldn't have to explain this one. Smoking isn't good for you, your sperm, eggs, and baby that you conceive.

                  * Eat organic
                  Some people believe that the pesticides found on vegetables and fruit, and artificial hormones found in milk and dairy products can have a negative effect on fertility. When we were trying again I tried to eat organic fruit and veg wherever possible and also switched to organic milk and yoghurts. I remember reading that if you only switch to eating/drinking one organic thing, make it milk.

                  If you spend a bit of time searching online you'll come across a whole host of different recommendations, ranging from the unproven to the controversial. When you're desperate to conceive it can be very easy to get sucked in and want to try everything going.
                  Just remember the most important things are to take folic acid, stop smoking, cut back on alcohol, eat a healthy diet and try not to get stressed about it all. Many people who live unhealthy lives manage to have healthy babies without any problems, but by making a few lifestyle changes you can increase your chances of having a healthy pregnancy and giving your baby the best start in life.

                  I got pregnant again within three months of the miscarriage, and although it was a rough ride, nine months later I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby girl. I'll never know if the measures I took, including taking supplements and having regular acupuncture helped, but they certainly didn't do any harm!

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                    30.05.2008 01:43
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                    The hardest job you will ever do

                    There are a lot of things that women can do to prepare for pregnancy but i do not think anything actually 'prepares' you for the major changes your body will go through. Let me explain...

                    If you are 'trying' for a baby then the sensible thing to do is for both of you to get a health check at your doctors. Start taking folic acid, eat healthily and lose weight if you need to. So there we have the obvious physical aspects to preparing.

                    The emotional side is each month waiting for your period to not arrive! With all three of my pregnancies it took a few months to conceive and the disappointment and sadness i felt when i got those first pangs of period cramp was unreal. You need to stay positive and try to not let it dictate your life, the more relaxed you are the better chances you have of conceiving.

                    After getting pregnant with my first child i was elated! Then after a couple of weeks the joy i felt was replaced with fear that i would miscarry, i had no reason to feel like this but once your hormones begin springing into action you will start to feel irrational at times! Luckily everything was fine and i had a fantastic pregnancy, i seemed to breeze through everything.

                    My second pregnancy unfortunately was cursed from the beginning as some are and resulted in the baby dying at 11 weeks. At the time i was heartbroken and felt like i could never go through anything like that again.

                    My third pregnancy was different again, i suffered terrible sickness which only seemed to ease with a packet of crisps - any flavour would do and they were the only things that would stay down. Then i started to bleed and all the old feelings from previously came flooding back, luckily everything was fine.
                    During this pregnancy i also suffered with terrible back ache and pelvis pain.

                    I learnt that you can't really ever prepare yourself for pregnancy as everyones experiences are different and each pregnancy is different. All you can do is be healthy and sensible and let nature do the rest.

                    Don't listen to people with horror stories about pregnancy and labour, most of the time they exaggerate to make it sound worse than it actually was. Think about the outcome, when you get to hold the life you created. Yes it will be hard work from the word go but it will also be very rewarding and thats what it is all about.

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                      04.10.2002 07:55
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                      • "You will have to give up your life for someone who is so rude and vile to you"

                      I'll give you the BEST advice on having a baby, if you must - then make sure you really have picked your partner well, cos if you don't you could end up being a single parent and that is damn hard work - I know. Next - the bit no-one tells you when you are gooing and aring over baby clothes. Sure you'll go through all the pain and the years of slog and hard work, and yes the first four years are wonderful, (mostly) but then they go to school and and pick up all sorts of foul lanuage and behaviour from other kids. Your whole life will evolve around your kids, you'll be the greatest parent, but then they turn into ~~~TEENAGERS, have you really thought what that is like? Just take a look at any website with parents angst and despair on kids as young as eleven, treating their parents like something off their shoe. You'll be in tears as you realise one day that they no longer want you, just their friends, they'll want to stay out late, they'll lie to you about where they are. As soon as they start secondary school they will be encouraged to smoke and I can tell you, that ALL the kids in my daughters year, (aged 14) now smoke. They even bring cannabis to school. They will drink alcohol at any opportunity, and most likely have sex before 14. You will have a lifetime of worry and stress. On top of all this, they will swear at you, give you mental stress trying to manipulate you and get their own way, they'll rarely show any gratitude for all the years of slog and time you have put in. You won't know where to turn, let's hope at this stage you got your man right, they will cost you an absolute fortune, wanting money for all sorts of rubbish, and they'll be rude and aggressive to you often, and they will never want to help you with anything, you'll get so sick of asking them to do a job - you'll end up doning it yourself. Let's not also forget that childbirth does terrible da
                      mage to the inside of a womans body, and you'll probably need surgery twenty years down the line for a prolapse or some other gynae problems. So I have to ask you is this what you really want? I wish someone had told me all this when I thought it would be great to have kids, no I'm not joking, I would never have had them, and then I would now have a LIFE.

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                        19.07.2002 17:34
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                        Get a good man is the very first preparation for pregnancy! I think though that we had better presume that you have got that side of things sorted out. I think this is going to be more a case of do as I say not do as I did. I hardly prepared for pregnancy. We had been married for a year when we saw a little sweet baby on the television of all places and we both thought arrr and how about us having one. As simple as that! I was on the pill and waited till I had come to the end of the packet and didnt take any more. The next month I was a couple days late and got hopeful. When I had missed 2 periods as you had to in those days I went to the doctor left a sample and the next day went back and they told me I was expecting. What I should have done of course is before I came off the pill go to the doctors for a check up and wait a couple of months before coming off the pill! Dont think that the month after you stop taking the pill you will become pregnant. I was very very lucky. My second baby took 4 months and my third I could not believe but over 8 months! Every month trying for my third I cried and cried. I wondered if I could have children!! yes even after having two you start to wonder. After 6 months I thought that it would never happen and knew my husband was getting upset and yes a bit fed up about the tears every month. So believe it or not I put it right out of my mind. I wouldnt put down when I had my last period or when my next would be. That is how much I put it out of my mind to save all the upset. Then I was pregnant. I had a lot of explaining to do when the doctor wanted to know all my dates! This is not your first I would have thought you knew we would want to know all this to make the accuracy of the due date good. The Doctor will arrange your hospital visits with visits to him inbetween. You should also go to antinatal classes. I went to one. They
                        told us all about looking after your babies teeth! Now when you have never had a baby, you only look as far as holding the baby in your arms. So awful as it is I did not go again. As for the delivery I think I "coped" beter than any of the mums that went to classes. In the first couple of months of pregnancy take extra care as this is one of the worse times for miscarriages. Do not take the dustbins out. Try not to party till the early hours of the morning. Dont drink too much. Dont go over eating thinking I'm going to be large so no one will notice. You will after the birth and you have to get rid of the weight you have put on. I know a lot of people dont buy prams now but when my first was born you did and a lot of people, my Mum, were superstitious about having one in the house before the baby arrived so a lot of firms allowed you to buy them and would deliver them after your baby had been delivered. If you get morning sickness eat dry toast. It worked twice for me. The third? I was even having morning sickness half hour before she was born. Dont miss Doctors and Hospital appointments. It is very important to have blood pressure taken and your weight. Mum is always right. Not your Mum but you. Listen to advice and then do what you think is best for yourself and the Baby. Every year a little something is done a different way in hospital births so do things the way the hospital suggest, if it is right for you. One last thing is that everyone who has given birth can tell you a tale about a pregnancy and a "I remember when I was pregnant" tale. Dont be put off. It is not like going to the dentist where you have the pain but nothing to gain. Once you hold your baby in your arms everything else is forgotten.

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                          15.08.2001 17:02
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                          I'm single and if you've read some of my other op's know that so far I have not been successful in finding the right man to share my life with! As I am fiercely independent it's also unlikely that at 37 I'll find someone I want to share anything with, let alone my life, space etc etc :-) However, all of a sudden the unexpected has happened, something hormonal has kicked in and I am actually looking at babies in a meternal way instead of scowling at the Mothers as they wait by the tills in Sainsburys, no longer am I thinking people should not be allowed to bring their children here....but thinking what would I do if I brought my baby here...... So - how am I going to prepare for mature pregnancy. My friend is the same age and has just had her second baby, she was referred to as a geriatric mother right from the start. So she gave birth with gas and air at home to avoid all the preconceptions (excuse the pun!) that goes with older pregnancies. She was sensible and did everything that an older mother should do - which is about the same as a younger mother, take folic acid before pregnancy, ensure she eats the right things, lots of fruit and vegetables, and exercise. The other thing she did was to apply the right creams to the relevant bits during pregnancy to help them stretch at the right time. This is something older mothers need to do as they may have lost a bit of flexibility.....:-( The advanatages of being an older mother during pregnancy outweigh the disadvantages. There is an increased risk of a Downs Syndrome baby and they had considered this and decided to keep it if this was the case. The tests for this are less invasive now so the risk to the baby is less but they decided to just go with the ultra sound tests to tell them anything they needed to know. The advantages are that the mother is more mature and more likely to be able to take what life throws at them! My friend i
                          s also financially better off having built a career first which means she can afford more choices for her child as time goes on. yes - I know that money isn't everything but it can be useful when you need to get away from it all!! This is not a criticism of younger mothers, everyone does their job differently as a parent. All in all, taking the health issues into account the only thing a mature mother needs to do is prepare herself mentally for a complete turn around in her world. With an increasing number of women having children in their late thirties, early fourties they no longer feel like a pariah at the school gate and can use their life experience to help them through. The main thing she needs to do is prepare herself mentally before getting pregnant......now all I have to do is find a father for my baby.......any offers?? :-)

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