One big "happy?" family (Sibling Rivalry!)

Member Name: dibuzz

Product:	Sibling Rivalry!
Date:	22/08/01 (49 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: to fight so passionately I believe they must love each other underneath

Disadvantages: upsets family life

Being an only child I never understood how other children could complain about their brothers and sisiters. I would have swapped places anyday.

Years later I am the mother of 4 kids who fight non stop and am tearing my hair out!

We started off doing everything we thought was right. When I was expecting my second son we involved the first in everything we could. His grandparents started to take him out every Sunday as a treat which they carried on after the baby was born. We bought presents from the new baby to his big brother.

For a few months everything was great with only the occasional bit of attention seeking from the older one. The problems started when the little one started to crawl and kept spoiling his lines of cars which nobody was allowed to touch.

Things were not too bad but when my daughter was born I expected more trouble. However they loved their little sister and did everything for her. It was only when she became more mobile that my second son started to hit out at her and enjoyed making her cry. He also became defiant.

I had another boy two years later and they were all great with him (maybe because we had problems and didn't think he would make it).

For a while the two older boys pulled together to help me look after the little ones and were all very close but suddenly the fighting started. They fight in pairs, the older 2 the middle 2 and the younger 2. Any other combination is fine.

The middle two are the biggest problem. My daughter clearly loves her brother but he can't stand her and we can't leave them alone together. She takes out her feelings on the little one who then gangs up with son no 2. The eldest only fights with the next one down.

I can't stay in bed when more than one gets up as I know the fighting will start anytime. They fight over anything from who sits where to who has the most (or least if it's carrots).

There are odd
times when they are all playing together and I think how nice it is but it doesn't last. The annoying thing is that they all let themselves be pushed around by other kids and don't stand up to them.

Hopefully they will get on better as they grow up but for now I just try to ignore it (unless someone is clearly getting hurt) and this seems to stop them as they aren't getting the attention.

I am assured by other parents that it is all quite normal so I try not to worry and have thrown away the number of the dogs home where I keep threatening to go and live.

Of course I love them all equally and even the one or two who have driven me mad all day by arguing and fighting get a big hug at bedtime.

Summary: