My top 5 tips. (Tips on Coping)

Member Name: Claribella

Product:	Tips on Coping
Date:	09/03/09 (78 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: so rewarding

Disadvantages: hard work

No matter how clued up you are on babies, being responsible for your own newborn child will have you questioning your sanity and whether you are ever going to get an oz of your life back to normal ever again. I had my second child six months a go and there is only 19 months between my two boys. I would have had less of a gap as we were trying for another one when my first son was just three weeks old but it wasn't to be due to breast feeding. I absolutely love being a mum and I am very blessed because I am able to stay at home with them but there are moments, especially in the early days, that I did question whether I was cut out to be a mother. Here are my top five tips on how to cope with being a parent.

1) It's not always going to be this way.
My top, top, top tip ever is to always remember that 'Everything is for a season'. When I was experiencing sleepless nights with my first son I was at my wits end sometimes. I was so tired that I was an emotional wreck but with my second I knew that it would pass. Even now when Elijah wakes up and I find myself getting annoyed about it, I just think 'OK there is nothing I could do about this, it's happening BUT it's only for a season'. Whether that season lasts for a few nights, a few weeks or a couple of years, the fact remains that even three years is only a tiny amount of time in a life time and that's how I 'Snap' myself out of it. You can put this point into practice with every situation you experience with your little ones; when they are ill, when they are weeing everywhere due to potty training and even when they are ill, it's only for a short time. That's what keeps me sane!

2) Ask for help.
Asking for help is a sign of maturity and no one will think any less of you. If your baby is screaming it's head off and nothing you do seems to settle it or if you have a toddler who is running rings around you then sometimes all it takes is a different face for them to stop. You can go and calm down and they will too. Children are so clever, they can sense how you are feeling and the more stressed you get the harder work they will become. If you are able to have a night away from your child then that's even better sometimes because you realize that you miss them so much and have a new found patience when they return.

If you are struggling at all speak to family, friends or any health professional. It will make you feel better.

3) Join a mother and toddler group.
For me this action has been invaluable. Speaking and making friends with other mums has made me realize that Noah isn't the only child that doesn't want to sit quickly at the table all day and ponder the future! I'm so greatful to beable to discuss the in's and out's of every milestone with mum's who are going through the same thing. It makes you realsie that you aren't the only one in that boat. You can also make some great friends and so can your kids.

4) The kids come first.
That's a general rule that I have figured out lately. I found that trying to do the dishes or hovering just doesn't work sometimes. If my kids need me then I drop what I'm doing and spend time with them because the housework can wait. I was finding that I was getting stressed because I wasn't getting the house work done. I was trying to but Noah was screaming in my ear and I just ended up getting stressed with what I was doing and with him. Itry to do the worst of it when the boys are in bed so they come first when they are up.

5) Finally get a routine as soon as possible. Kids feel secure when they have a routine. They know where they stand and they are less likely to be wild children. I find that it's great for me too because I know what I need to be doing and when.

Over all try and enjoy them because it goes so fast!

Summary: my top tips