Newest Review: ... staying at home... that makes me laugh, how many 'non-working' mums stay at home all day? I consider myself to be very fortunate that fir... more
Working Mums vs. Stay at Home Mums
Member Name: rosieym
Working Mums vs. Stay at Home Mums
Advantages: A little me time
Disadvantages: Not enough us time
When i got pregnant it was a bit of a surprise, To find out i was going to be a single mum was an even bigger surprise to me and threw my world upside down. I soon came to realise that actually all that matter was my child and being able to provide for him.
I worked all the hours possible in my pregnancy to try and build myself a little rainy day fund, in the hope that it would see me through for a while after my maternity pay ended.
As it turned out i made the decision very early on to stay at home with my DS long after my Maternity pay ended. I knew this would mean relying on Benefits to support us both but it was a hard decision to make at the time but it felt like the right one FOR US.
Once my Maternity pay ended in the September i contaced the job centre to find out about benefits and what my next move would be. Well turns out, it was not that easy. Because of my Working Tax Credit run on, that everyone gets if they leave work for any reason, would not be paid for a month i could not apply until i had received this money and it was gone. I was told to come back in Novemeber to reapply and then it would take roughly 2 to 3 weeks to process my claim. This left me and my son in a 2 bedroom house with no way of supporting ourselves at all.
This lead me to take a massive jump and get back to work, Several phone calls later and i was returning to work with a company i had worked for previous to my last job on the following Monday(this is from the Wednesday before!) and my son was off to nursery. It was that quick. All i ever wanted to do was do my best for my son and if going back to work was what it would take, even if it was not what i wanted I had to do it.
After the first month back at work, once the tax credits had sorted themselves out and we had both settled in, i soon realised that it was the best move i could have made for us both. My ds adores nursery and has come on in leaps and bounds and after a year there i could not imagine taking him out of there at all.
As for me Work has been tough, After 6 months in one job the company went bust, which broke my heart after 6 years with the company. I was extremley lucky to fall on my feet and be back in a job 3 days later, this was for the company i had worked for as a temp while pregnant.
Now after almost 10 months in this job, i am still a temp, who has learnt how disposable i am and being pushed from pillar to post. But a jobs a job. I am now at the stage where i dream of more time with my DS but i know it is just mummy guilt and on the whole me working and him at nursery is really for the best.
And for any single parents out there who thinks they are better off on Benefits i am here to tell you this is not the case at all, With help for nursery fee's plus Tax credits along side this and a full time wage, i am possibly more comfortable now than i ever was before having my son.
But then again not a day goes by that i couldn't cry about how much i miss him.
It is such a huge choice for anyone that i would never judge parents who work or parents who chose to stay at home especially after being on the wrong end of some nasty Judgements myself.
Summary: Working mum's rock, SAHM's Rock, Us mummies Rock!