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Stay at Home
Working Mums vs. Stay at Home Mums
Member Name: Whizz11
Working Mums vs. Stay at Home Mums
Advantages: Love being able to stay at home
I thought I would weigh into the debate as this is obviously something I have experience in and something that is personal to me as I had a baby girl at the end of last year. This is definitely a controversial subject as there are definitely two sides to the argument/subject and I can see both sides but I have to say that I am pretty much on the stay at home mother side.
Luckily I have a great husband who earns enough money for me to be able to stay home comfortably. That's not to say that we can be extravagant and have had to tighten the purse strings in various areas but we can pay the mortgage, bills, nights out, holidays etc and my Dooyoo money goes into a clothes fund for myself and my little girl. I know there are some people who can't cover these bills but and having to go back is the only option but then sometimes you look at the lifestyle they lead and can see why they need to go back, 4/5 bed house, 2 BMW's in the drive, and you have to think what you really want from life, do you want material goods and a life of luxury but kids who only see you when you pick them up from the childminders or do you want happy kids that you have been able to influence and perhaps a 3 bed house and one Ford Focus in the driveway. Yes, it's a give and take but I know what I would go for.
I always knew I wanted to be a stay at home mum and my husband and I discussed it beforehand and planned for it to make sure i could become a reality. To me its so important for me to bring my kids up myself. I am happy to be the one to sing to them and make all my own homemade baby food, teach them to read etc. I think it's important for the kids too to have their parents there when they are very young. It's us who shape who they are and I wouldn't want that responsibility going to a nursery or childminder. I take my little girl to a number of free activities during the week and one of them is a singing class in our local library. There are a couple of kids who attend with their grandparents. I think it's great when grandparents can help with bringing up their grandchildren but after observing them and talking to a few of them the grandparents are all really tired and missing their freedom in their retirement years but feel guilty when they say they cannot help. Some of them look so weary and do not really interact with the kids and the kids look so bored because no one is playing with them.
So, do I get bored and miss my career? Well, I most certainly don't get bored as I don't talk about babies 24/7. I think it's important to keep my mind active and into other pursuits too so I can be an all rounded individual too. I run and enjoy taking part in that sport and also make time to see my friends without babies and take time to talk about politics, the state of the economy etc. I was a personal assistant to the Chairman of a bank before I had my baby girl so got quite high in the business world. I enjoyed working but always knew that there was more to life than paycheck after paycheck and wanted to give my family my full and undivided attention.
In conclusion I would say that all kids really need is your time, love and affection and if you are lucky enough to be able to give them that then it really is a nice situation to be in for them and you.
Summary: Working v stay at home mothers
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