Think Nowt of Newts? (Reptiles & Amphibians in general)

Member Name: Plumptious

Product:	Reptiles & Amphibians in general
Date:	26/03/01 (281 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Little known fact about newts.

Disadvantages: Strange but true.

This is a tale of newts. They were the Greater British Spotted Newts. On the other hand, they might have been called something else. I forget. Once you've been introduced to more than one type of newt, the names and faces tend to blur into one.

What is true is that they lived in a little stretch of water on a bit of wasteland. One of the giants of British industry owned the land and decided to develop it. The conservationists were up in arms. These were an endangered type of newt and making them homeless for mercenary reasons was simply not acceptable.

Negotiations began. The industrial giant had another piece of wasteland, complete with a body of water. Would this serve as a satisfactory new home?

The conservationists preferred not to have the newts moved at all, but had to be realistic. Their concerns remained, though. What if the newts did not settle in?

"Well", said the exasperated pinstriped gentleman from the industrial giant. How did one establish if newts liked their new home?

Apparently, all newts are not the same. Newts are individuals. And in proud testament of the fact, their spots are different. The spots on their little damp bellies are as different as our fingerprints.

A plan was drawn up. The newts would be moved. Each newt moved would be "fingerprinted", and their details stored on a database. Appropriately qualified naturalists would keep tabs on the newts, using their tummy fingerprints to keep track of individuals.


And this is where I got to hear about it through a friend. He heard of the little artificial intelligence project that had been set up. The program, when presented with the tummy print of a newt, would work out and thus "recognise" the newt.

And how were the tummy prints of the newts created? Go on, guess.

Well, the newts were photocopied. The photocopies made wonderful tummy prints.
And no,
it wasn't cruel. In fact, they seem to like the warmth of the photocopier.


I have now been left with the image of a Portakabin in the middle of a piece of wasteland. It's a dark, still night. The faint sounds of a party can be heard.
Zooming into the Portakabin, we can see four newts lined up on a photocopier, wearing sunshades. A fifth newt jumps on the "COPY" button, and the machine does its thing, exuding welcome warmth.

Summary: