Slowly does it! (Tortoise)

Member Name: catatonic

Product:	Tortoise
Date:	08/07/00 (352 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: so crap they're fun

Disadvantages: pricey to buy

I know I said I wouldn't write any more pet reviews but I completely overlooked the dear old tortoise and quite frankly he just can't be left out!

In the bad old days, when tortoises were imported in their thousands and a couple made it to the pet shop in one piece, my politically incorrect mother decided to get me and my sister one each as pets.

After ceremoniously naming them Oscar and Tosca ( don't ask me why I was about five and have absolutely no recollection!) we introduced them to their new habitat ( namely our back garden!) and waited for them to do something interesting... and waited ... and waited....

It took us about five and a half minutes to conclude that tortoises were going to be a poor investment. Maybe we just had two dud tortoises ( after all they could have been brain damaged in transit or something ) but they simply didn't do anything!

Tortoises are the ideal pet for the person that dislikes pets. They don't have any interest in you at all, they don't cost very much and they sleep for half of the year ( so u can bung them in a box in the garage and forget you ever bought them! )

Actually for all my light hearted banter I quite like tortoises!! They're a hoot to watch eating ( you can tell I don't get out much! ) and contrary to popular opinion they can really shift it if they want to escape ( ours made several attempts at tunnelling their way out under the garden fence! ) sadly our tortoise days came to an end when they did escape and sat in the middle of a main road ( ok so I neglected to say that tortoises are also not very bright!)

Tortoises are pretty hastle free apart from the hibernation bit ( some forget to wake up! ) and they make very easy and inexpensive pets. Of course these days they actually cost a fair whack to purchase - hence the sudden trendiness of an otherwise totally uncool creature!

Summary: