an extremely helpful incite (Allies in Healing - Laura Davis)

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Product:	Allies in Healing - Laura Davis
Date:	25/09/00 (16 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: good resource of info

Disadvantages: doesn't help the partner to cope

Allies in Healing is an excellent resouce for information. It filled a void when desparately needed. However in the book, I also found the role of "partner" was idealized and that the reality of dealing with a survivor in a relationship was much worse than anticipated. Trust, the essential ingredient for a loving-giving relationship, is continually questioned, continually under attack. Because it is "safe", anger, rage, even vengeful acts, triggered by earlier abuse, are vented on the partner. Unless great care is taken, a slippery slope of acceptance of the intolerable is initiated by the partner which will eventually doom the relationship. Laura Davis, in a future edition, could be more explicit as to how the "partner" can better protect themselves and thus give the relationship a better chance of surviving. There are hard to find groups for "partner's" which I found invaluable

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