Angel Uncovered - Katie Price
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Angel of Deathly Dullness
Angel Uncovered - Katie Price
Member Name: LadyAudley
Product:
Angel Uncovered - Katie Price
Date: 12/11/09
Rating:
Advantages: None
Disadvantages: Terrible!
This book is so unbelievably, screamingly, achingly TERRIBLE that if you're used to reading good novels, it will probably make you want to gouge your eyes out with horror. In fact, so great are the levels of dreadfulness that it achieves, that it transcends its awfulness and becomes (unintentionally) hilarious.
The thing that first strikes you is Katie Price's amazing imagination. She really goes to town to imagine a life different from her own, showing her deep empathy and compassion for other people. Her heroine, Angel, is - guess what - a glamour model! Her life involves posing for lad's mags and tabloids. She's married to a celebrity (a footballer, Cal) with whom she has a young child, Honey. However, they are having some relationship issues due to post-natal depression - gasp!-, an experience which is described with all the finesse of a dying pigeon waddling in the gutter.
The pantomime-like characters in the book fall into three categories: Angel's adoring entourage (cheer!), bitchy designer-clad WAGs who are jealous of Angel's beauty (boo, hiss!), and hunky men ready to throw themselves at Angel's feel (phwoar!). The story - if it can be called a story - revolves around shopping, texting, clubbing and hot tubs. There are a couple of amusing moments where Katie attempts to describe emotional scenes, including one where Angel gets a bit upset and decides to kill herself, and these are described with all the finesse of a rampaging buffalo in a china shop. (In case you were hoping, I'm sorry to say that our heroine does not succeed in her attempt, and lives on to tell yet more godawful tales). Zola it ain't.
You wouldn't expect Katie Price to be a Jane Austen of prose - and, guess what, she's not. Sentences are bare, and most of the big words are brand names. There are amusing moments where Jordan just gets words wrong, for instance when Angel's adoring gay hairdresser tells her he'd bang her if he wasn't a 'homosexualist'! It's like reading a Janet and John book crossed with Now magazine.
However, even in the 'so bad it's good' stakes, this starts to wear thin pretty quickly. The book is around 400 pages long, and even my admiration for the awfulness was fading by the half way point. By two thirds of the way through, I would rather have indulged in self-mutilation than continued. Jilly Cooper offers much more fun silliness, if you want to read fluff.
The thing that first strikes you is Katie Price's amazing imagination. She really goes to town to imagine a life different from her own, showing her deep empathy and compassion for other people. Her heroine, Angel, is - guess what - a glamour model! Her life involves posing for lad's mags and tabloids. She's married to a celebrity (a footballer, Cal) with whom she has a young child, Honey. However, they are having some relationship issues due to post-natal depression - gasp!-, an experience which is described with all the finesse of a dying pigeon waddling in the gutter.
The pantomime-like characters in the book fall into three categories: Angel's adoring entourage (cheer!), bitchy designer-clad WAGs who are jealous of Angel's beauty (boo, hiss!), and hunky men ready to throw themselves at Angel's feel (phwoar!). The story - if it can be called a story - revolves around shopping, texting, clubbing and hot tubs. There are a couple of amusing moments where Katie attempts to describe emotional scenes, including one where Angel gets a bit upset and decides to kill herself, and these are described with all the finesse of a rampaging buffalo in a china shop. (In case you were hoping, I'm sorry to say that our heroine does not succeed in her attempt, and lives on to tell yet more godawful tales). Zola it ain't.
You wouldn't expect Katie Price to be a Jane Austen of prose - and, guess what, she's not. Sentences are bare, and most of the big words are brand names. There are amusing moments where Jordan just gets words wrong, for instance when Angel's adoring gay hairdresser tells her he'd bang her if he wasn't a 'homosexualist'! It's like reading a Janet and John book crossed with Now magazine.
However, even in the 'so bad it's good' stakes, this starts to wear thin pretty quickly. The book is around 400 pages long, and even my admiration for the awfulness was fading by the half way point. By two thirds of the way through, I would rather have indulged in self-mutilation than continued. Jilly Cooper offers much more fun silliness, if you want to read fluff.
Summary: Avoid!
