The Sound of Paint Drying (John Hegley in general)

Member Name: theediscerning

Product:	John Hegley in general
Date:	08/05/04 (90 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Some fun

Disadvantages: Less verse

Having been a John Hegley fan for many years, ever since his first tentative steps onto television, followed by a little slot at an anti~whaling rally in Trafalgar Square (of all things), theediscerning is ever keen on seeing new books by him in the library. The Sound of Paint Drying is the latest, and is roughly number eight~and~a~bit in the list (the bit being a short privately published thing, added to The Family Pack compendium for us completists).

However, with the second half of the list branching out into short stories, playlets, and extended sequences of light frippery that lost the Hegley edge, the books have long since lost any potential five~star status, although consistently keeping up a strong appeal regardless. Would this latest hardback fare better, on a recent train journey?

For those few who have not read or heard him, the ?standard? Hegley is a short poem, to humorous effect, sitting proud in large print in a poor~value book near you now. The hour maximum spent reading a Hegley book will provide many chuckles, or at least snickers, plus possibly the thought of being able to emulate him, or improve (especially when considering the print~to~price ratio making such compilations seem such easy work). Such thoughts should be banished, of course, or the world would be swamped with more failed comedic pub poets than it could shake a stick at.

And after a decently amusing title page picture, and a funny vignette, the humorous poems are what we first see. Hats Off to Luton combines imaginary parental conversation with the regular Hegley concern of the town in which he grew up, and also forces football in. This comes up again in the next work, which again is more of a tiny snippet of life, being an amusing anecdote in blank verse.

These anecdotes only continue, and while six pages of childhood snapshots are amusing, light and breezy, they again consort to make the pages look very empty, sparse, and poor value. Howev

er this is to have ignored page two, and to ignore the next pair, which contain more sensitive poems, that concern universal themes ~ home, and love ~ better than any reminiscence; and show a romantic soul creating what is nearly (shock, horror) high art. Nearly, mind.

We next come to the first major opus in the book, for there are at least one and a half herein, the half being the title piece. This, 'The Totel Hotel Experience, Scotland', is a long narrative, presumably with semblances of truth in among the obligatory references to dogs, spectacles and potatoes. Some of it allows for a breaking into verse or line drawing again, but on the whole it is very lightweight, easy~to~read prose. The end result, however, is no classic exactly, and is not that bad that one regrets John Hegley?s decision to stop concentrating so much on the poems, but one can reserve that judgment.

It would be a waste of everyone's time to itemise all the works in The Sound of Paint Drying, but it must be repeated that a lot of the small pieces here are not the poems of the earlier books, rather short paragraphs and snippets of life. These range from current affair concerns on the Luton Town terraces, to pieces of life of old, from University days on, and from London to Colombia. Some are just for humour, some are more poignant, and some counter previous Roman considerations by bringing up ancient Greek legend (oo~er).

The credit at the beginning thanks Radio 4 for being "where some of the enclosed pieces first surfaced", and included in this is the title piece. Whereas some people can churn out 400pp amusing travelogues with some esoteric raison d'etre, John manages in just a dozen pages of narrative, the story of his father creating a painting while living in France in 1931, and of John's own recreation of said view. If the snippets about Hegley children and love were not signs of a Hegley that had matured since the days
of Mi
serable Malcolm from Morecambe, this story of linking back with the past, finding oneself and of trying to understand, emulate and succeed his father, certainly is.

On the whole this latest volume of Hegley contains the usual subjects, plus perhaps more of the mellow, the mundane and the maturity growing in his work. There is little in the way of classic Hegley poetry, but the deftness of touch and subject can at times compensate for the lack of word~and rhythm~play of the verse of old. While there will never be a day when an hour's worth of reading at £11 for the hardback will get five stars, a reflection on skimming the tome again for the sake of this review gives it a rewarding four. It is recommended for big Hegley fans, however should be read free from the local library for the curious novitiates first before purchase.

It must be admitted too that theediscerning has for a long time wished other things from John Hegley, if not better. For, soon after said whale rally, John seemed to be spending too much time performing with Nigel and the banjo, before any of the books had an over~long, take~it~or~leave~it Magnum Opus inside. But as said before, the man is to be applauded for his verse and more, and is an imitation~free literary star.

Eventually theediscerning will admit "Fair play" to John Hegley, as he continues to write for himself and his many accepting fans, and not for those curmudgeons who insist he should stick to the quirky, on~and~off~beat poetry he became initially known for. It is predicted that this will happen in two and a third books' time, the third being? oh, never mind.


The Sound of Paint Drying is on Methuens' poetry and humour lists at £10.99, with the ISBN 0~413~73170~7. It came out in September 2001 and still isn't in paperback, so either someone forgot or they're waiting for the next one...

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