Marrying the Mistress or What is life all about? (Marrying the Mistress - Joanna Trollope)

Member Name: catsholiday

Product:	Marrying the Mistress - Joanna Trollope
Date:	11/10/08 (103 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Easy to read and relevant to life today

Disadvantages: Characters rather obviously good or bad

The cast:
Laura and Guy Stockbrook - Guy is leaving Laura
Their children - Alan and Simon Stockbrook
Simon married Carrie - 3 kids Jack, Emma and Rachel l
Guy 's mistress is Merrion Palmer
Her mum is Gwen Palmer

I bought this book from a charity shop or jumble sale as part of my pile to take to South America, I always look for normal clear print and not too deep, as in intellectual, for a book to read on the plane. This was my choice for the journey from Amsterdam to Lima.

The story is, pretty obviously from the title, one about a man leaving his wife to marry his considerably younger mistress. Ms Trollope, unlike many authors, does not focus her story on the passionate love of the relationship between the older man and his mistress, she focuses instead on the relationships that are affected by the breakup of the marriage and those connected to the younger mistress. The various chapters flashback to the original marriage of Guy Stockbrook, the older man and also the Merrion's childhood and her relationship with her mother so that the reader is gradually introduced to the characters and also gains some background into their lives and some understanding about why the breakdown in the marriage takes place and why Merrion might have become attracted to someone old enough to be her father.

Guy is a judge and is married to Laura who has gradually become more and more dependent upon Guy and her sons, Alan and Simon to provide her support and her whole 'raison d'etre really. Laura is the sort of mother-in -law you dread, who rings up her son Simon ( married to Carrie, an independent working mum with 3 teenage children - Jack, Rachel and Emma who cause their challenges by simply being teenagers with all the usual hassles) and virtually demands that he comes over to sort out some problem for her. The emotional blackmail of tears on the phone and talk of all the sacrifices she made for her family are her main weapons. She also throws in inability to cope with having to move out of the family home and leaving the garden which she has created over the years - ostensibly for the family but in reality it is her hobby as no-one else wa really that interested.

Simon's family are pulled apart because Simon is 'forced' to act as his mother's lawyer in the divorce. Laura has never liked Carrie and makes this obvious - probably because Caries is a capable, working mother but also because she married Simon who is Laura's favourite son. Simon is the favoured one because he falls for the pressure of Laura's neediness whereas Alan is more down to earth and offers emotional sympathy with a balance of sensible practical advice which his mother doesn't like.

As the plot develops Simon's family becomes more stressed and the children's problems begin escalate as Simon spends more and more time sorting his mother's demands and less time at home. He is also being pulled in 3 directions, his mother's neediness , his family's time and support and guilt about not being able to talk to his father because he is being forced to act legally for his mother.

Alan, the sensible son gets on well with Carrie so is able to act as a bridge between the various elements of the family . Guy has obviously been a good grandfather over the years and has also got on with Carrie. They are both able to see why Guy might have been attracted to someone else as Laura has not been a real partner in his life over the years. They are not condoning his actions but merely able to see how/why it happened and because it has happened it needs to be dealt with and move one.

Alan's life is not all it seems either and during the story he begins a relationship which comes with its own interest to the rest of the family. Jack, the son of Simon also falls in love in the middle of all this drama and has to deal with all the emotions of his first teenage love followed by rejection without the support of his parents who are involved in the drama of his grandparents emotionally messy divorce.

We also follow the story of Merrion whose father died at a very young age and her mother who married again but was let down by the second marriage. The relationship between Merrion and her mother is clouded by her mother, Gwen's attitude to men. She has been let down twice and so decided to avoid emotional relationships with them and concentrate on bringing up her daughter. Unfortunately over the years mother and daughter drift apart in their interests and attitudes to life. We are lead to believe that Merrion's attraction to Guy is probably based on the fact that she has built her dead father up to be a bit of a hero and so guy provides the comforting father figure she has looked for all her life.

Gwen, naturally is not best pleased when she hears that guy and Merrion are planning i to get married and she rushes up to London to stick her 'two penneth' in. This reaction is of course made more unpalatable to Merrion as she does not have a good relationship with her mother anyway.

All in all it is a story about families and relationships beyond the simple 'falling in love'. Ms Trollope handles the characters sensitively throughout. Interestingly we are taken on a bit of an emotional roller coaster as we should fell sympathy for Laura, as she is the 'wronged' wife but life is not black and white and so each character has a part to play in the drama and we empathise at different times for each of them as they struggle to come to terms with their situation.

In summary this book was an easy read for the plane with enough character interest and food for thought to keep me reading. It is not a blockbuster or Booker prize winner but is was entertaining and thought provoking and written in an easy style. I would recommend it for a beach read or travel read but probably more of a 'chick lit' book really. May be of particular interest to those who have been through or know someone who has been through a similar marriage breakdown as it does cover a range of emotional involvement, showing how a marriage breakdown affects more than the two people immediately involved .

Summary: Story of how a marriagebreakup affects a family