How do you turn your back on the only life you've ever known ? (Stolen Innocence - Elissa Wall)

Member Name: thehonesttruth

Product:	Stolen Innocence - Elissa Wall
Date:	06/11/09 (49 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: -

Disadvantages: -

I picked up this book from Asda the other dayl, intrigued by the tagline on the front cover ' Growing up in a polygamous sect, becoming a teenage bride, and breaking free '. I could tell from the photo on the front cover of a smiling child that this book was going to be a biography of sorts, and a look at the rear cover and the accompanying blurb proved this to be the case .

The book centres on the life of Elissa Wall, who was brought up as a member of the Fundamentalist Latter Day Saints, or FDLS. Now, before I get on with the main body of the review, I do feel it is important to make a distinction about how the FDLS differ from the 'main' branch of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints religion, commonly referred to as Mormon, and also the difference between both religions and traditional Christianity . My knowledge is a little limited, so do feel free to let me know if I have anything wrong .

All three religions use the bible and the stories within as a basis for their teachings. Where the LDS groups differ is that they have a second book, the Book of Mormon , which also plays an important part of their teachings. The contents of this book were shown to Prophet Joseph Smith, who was instructed to return each year to a certain spot, where he found gold tablets detailing various written testimonies from a people that god had directed to come to america 600 years before Jesus birth. These tablets became the foundation of the LDS religion.

One of the central elements of the LDS religion was Polygamy- however, in the early 2Oth century the Latter Day Saints abandoned the practice, which is illegal in the state of Utah. However, a branch of the religion broke off, and stuck to the old ways, including Polygamy - these are the FDLS, the group within which Elissa was raised.

Elissa grew up in a large family . Her mother was her fathers second wife (he later married a third), and she was but one of her fathers eventual 22 children . Polgamy was perfectly normal withing the FDLS faith, where it is believed that a man must have three wives to reach celestial heaven, and with Elissa like many children of the faith being generally isolated from interaction with people outside the faith, this was something she had no need to question as a child .

Elissa speaks frankly of the complexity of life in a polygamous household - the natural tensions and jealousies between the various mothers, and between the seperate groups of children. The mothers would often disagree about raising and disciplining the children, and about the handling of household affairs, and would often accuse each other of favouring their own children unfairly over the others. This led to tension and arguments, and led to the children naturally saiding with their own mothers.

This was hard enough with two wives, but when a third, Laura was added, the situation got worse, especially as Audrey and Laura, in Elissa's eyes formed a strong friendship which further sidelined Elissas mother . This led to her mother taking the step of speaking directly to the prophet, and to her father being deemed incapable of managing his family - Elissas mother was ordered to leave her husband, taking the children with her.

The family were eventually back together, but the problems only got worse , especially when some of the older children began to seriously question their faith , resulting in them being sent to 'reform', an intensive programme of hard physical work and prayer designed to re-educate them and bring them back into the faith. When this failed, they were instructed to leave the community, and declared 'Apostate' , with the rest of the family forbidden to contact them or socialise with them .

Elissa watched various sisters get married as they reached their late teens. Marriages took the form of a placement marriage - meaning that when a girl reached marriageable age, her partner was revealed in a vision from god to the prophet, who would then arrange and conduct a marriage . Having been raised in the FDLS religion since birth, this was perfectly normal to Elissa, who did not question it, even when her 17 year old sister was married to the aging and ill prophet, Rulon Jeffs .

Rulon suffered a stroke and became increasingly incapable of performing his duties as a prophet, with his son Warren stepping into the breach. From the start, although he declared he had no aspiration to be the prophet himself , showed himself to be a man greedy for power . Claiming to act as his fathers voice, he kept his father largely away from the community, and started making declarations of visions that had to be obeyed . One of these was for Elissas mother to once again leave her husband, and instead go into the care of Fred Jessop, a man who already had 15 wives and numerous children. Life got harder trying to balance the needs of so many people, and Elissas mother would eventually be ordered to marry Fred, and entrust herself permanently into his care. Life still carried on relatively normally, until when Elissa was 14, the prophet declared that she was be married to her first cousin, Alan Steed .

Despite many protestations that she was not ready or willing to be married, Elissa went ahead with the marriage, convinced that if she did not, her soul would be damned, and that her parents and siblings would also suffer . She had no knowledge of what was expected in the bedroom after marriage, and indeed no inclination to show any intimacy to her new husband - who refused to take no for an answer, and repeatedly raped and humiliated her . Trapped within the community , with no access to outside help and a deeply ingrained mistrust of officials that might have been able to help, Elissa largely suffered in silence, going through a series of miscarriages and becoming more and more unsatisfied with her life.

I'm going to stop there - I have only covered a small selection of the events in the book, and only in a very simple and basic way .

It's fair to say that some of the events in the book were very shocking to me, as were many of the things the children were taught . What shocked me most however was the level of trust people had in Warren Jeffs, who eventually suceeded his father as a prophet . It's something I personally have trouble wrapping my head around as an outsider, and I find it really quite scary that one man had such a huge level of control on a whole community. I'm hesitant to use words such as 'Mind Control' , but it does seem that people were led to believe that should they fail to obey instructions given by the prophet they would damn not only themselves, but their family too .

Even more shocking than that is that despite all Elissa was suffering, her family were largely unable, and in some cases, unwilling to help for fear of rocking the boat. Even when Elissas mother eventually learned of the rape and abuse, the best advice she had to offer was that maybe this was indeed god's will, and the Elissa should keep sweet and learn to be more obedient and submissive. That did provoke some anger in me when I read that, although it's important to remember that her mother was just as deeply indoctrinated into the religion as Elissa , and fearful of damning her whole family if she interfered .

It is at times hard to feel sympathy for Elissa , as her attitudes to others seem very naive and judgemental, and in the case of her husband (who initially tried to be kind to her and encourage her to love him) her treatment was very cold . Whether her attitudes were due to her youth at the time, or due to her upbringing is very hard to tell .

The story is by turns heartbreaking, shocking, and touching . Despite the horrors that Elissa went through, there are some moments of pure joy in rebellion, and it is inspiring that she was eventually able to break free, although not without a great deal of struggle and soulsearching .

It is shocking to think that such things do still occur in modern times , and there is still little authorities can do to prevent such things from happening, as these events are generally kept secret and hidden. Regardless of the religious aspect, no child should be sexually violated and abused in the manner Elissa was, and that she survived and broke free is an incredible testimony to her personal strength and courage .

I found the book quite well balanced - at no point does it demonise the FDLS religion itself - in fact, there are several parts of the book where the good points of the religion are touched upon - festivals, a sense of community, strong family ties.

I would definitely recommend this book - I read the whole thing in a state of horrified fascination, and while I can't say I 'liked' it , I will say that reading it really opened up my eyes to an issue I previously knew nothing about . Since reading the book, I've been reading articles online related to the events in the book and been even more shocked by the stories unearthed. In the centre of the book are also some coloured pictures which I do think are a nice inclusion, and I think are balanced because they also show the nicer side of life in the FDLS, as well as the bad points.

The book costs £4.06 on amazon.co.uk . I picked mine up from Asda reduced to £1, so it might be worth taking a quick look in your local supermarket to see if you can pick up a copy .

Highly recommended, because although the subject matter is difficult to read at times, I do feel this is an important book .

Summary: -