Stay or Leave? (Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay - Mira Kirshenbaum)

Member Name: lily7star

Product:	Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay - Mira Kirshenbaum
Date:	17/08/00 (402 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Clear and very practical

Disadvantages: it's long!

This is a very helpful book for anyone trying to figure out whether their relationship is working for them, and whether the good things outweigh the bad. As Kirshenbaum says "Your relationship is either too good to leave, or too bad to stay in, but it can't be both."
Kirshenbaum is a psychotherapist, and sets out simply and very clearly the questions anyone considering ending a relationship should be asking themselves.
Working through this will enable the reader to figure out what is valuable and lasting within a relationship and what is hurtful and destructive. If you're feeling stuck and totally unsure what to do, then my guess is that this book could well help unstick you. It gets away from the positive and negative lists type approach, which can leave you even more confused - weighing what you know about the present against what has to be a totally unknown future....
Kirshenbaum takes an unusual diagnostic approach to the problem, making you think about what *really* matters and what is *really* going on between you......
she asks questions such as : no 1
"Think about that time when things between you and your partner were at their best. Looking back, would you now say that things were really good between you then?"
Early in the book she also touches sensitively and accurately on domestic violence in a way which uncovers the reasons women often stay, and helps them find a way out.
It's a very densely written and thought-provoking book,279 pages of it. I recommend it if you're struggling with these issues, or to pass onto a friend who is.
It's the kind of book which could change your life.

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