| Product: |
Starbucks |
| Date: |
05/04/02 (1121 review reads) |
| Rating: |
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Advantages: One Starbucks looks just like another, Big choice of coffees
Disadvantages: One Starbucks looks just like another, Stupid ordering process which isn't even any good, Not the kind of place I'd enjoy my coffee
Recently, in my home town of Windsor, we too were introduced to the delights of Starbucks. Now, I have never been inside the Windsor branch, nor will I ever unless it stops being a Starbucks and becomes a place where you can order, receive and drink a cup of coffee, made with coffee, water, milk and sugar. That?s right, I?m bitter. Why? Because my first and last Starbucks experience disgusted me with just how pathetic the process of ordering a bloody hot drink can be.
For those of you who don?t know, Starbucks is America?s idea of a coffee lover?s paradise, offering everything coffee. And now it?s here in England. Syrups, chocolates, creams, froth, cold milk, hot milk ? oh, and coffee?
It was a bright summer?s day, and I was visiting my dad in London during his lunch break from taking photos. We had a nice lunch and decided to go for a coffee. There in front of us stood a Starbucks. Now, despite the anti-capitalist brigade who pretend they know what they?re talking about when they slag off Starbucks while they polish off a Big Mac, I thought it was worth a shot. After all, any company named after a Battlestar Galactica hero must be good, right?
Wrong. If ever there was a misuse of a cool name, this was it. I stepped inside. Nothing too awful so far. I knew my order, and it seemed that this was my first mistake. The chap asked me what I wanted, to which I replied ?one coffee and one latte please?. But it appears that this HUGE coffee chain doesn?t simply sell coffee or latte. I actually think the guy behind the counter didn?t understand me because my order was so straightforward and certain, or didn?t contain enough hot drink jargon. What size would I like? Fair enough question, I think I?ll have a large of each. Oh, no. Do I really HAVE to use Starbucks slang? Just give me a large coffee and a large latte! Ok, grande coffee and grande latte!
It defies belief. A check list, on a sticker. Stuck to the side o
f your mug. Boxes are ticked. The mug is passed on to another man. The process still manages to be less efficient than just making the bloody drink and taking my money. It strikes me that while this system may look quick, the people operating it are so slow that there is a queue anyway. And the order STILL manages to be wrong. Ok, I?ll have a grande latte too. Now, where are the spoons so I can stir my sugar, thankfully stored conventionally in sachets in a box. Ah, of course, I forgot. This place is obviously so avant-garde in coffee terms that even spoons are a thing of the past. We now have little wooden spatulas, which don?t stir at all, but just soak up coffee and look wet, so that when you?ve finished your grande bloody latte you are greeted by a heap of undisolved sugar nestling in the bottom of your cup.
Ok, you may have guessed that I am pretty nonplussed at the methods employed by Starbucks, and far from impressed. You?d be right. Ok, so the coffee was a little pricey but not ridiculous, but the ridiculous procedure necessary to get the thing was comically excessive. All I wanted was a relaxing cup, but how is this possible in an atmosphere akin to the stock market? Not at all worth it for what is eventually a strictly average cup of coffee with an exceptional name.
At least my coffee didn?t taste too bad, but everything else was awful, and even though the coffee was ok, it still wasn't the coffee I ordered ? ironic considering the painful inquisition to which I was subjected to order it. Should ordering a coffee be stressful? Should it worry you? Should it confuse you? Should it upset you, anger you, or terrify you? Should it waste time, paper, staff, and pronunciation lessons? Should a coffee-house look like a laboratory?
Regardless of whether Starbucks are trying to take over the world with the presence of their coffee-houses, the places themselves are simply bad. Mediocre coffee in an environment mo
re stressful than relaxing. The choice, admittedly, is excellent ? and, the more flamboyant your order the more risqué your order sounds. Maybe next time I?ll go for a Skinny Ethiopian in a tall mug made from oyster shells. Or maybe I?ll just go somewhere else. Sorry, I can?t resist this ? it really wasn?t my cup of tea.
Summary:
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Last comments:
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- 23/07/07 I love starbucks. The music is great and relaxing, the decorations are beautiful and the people are always nice. They have a great variety of coffee and pastrie. It's a great place to just relax, maybe do work, or just have a cup of coffee with my husband. |
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- 25/07/02 By the way, it may be worth pointing out that if you have such a hefty reaction to my opinion, it would be courteous to give it a rating. |
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- 10/07/02 Err, ok fair dos mate. BUT,
If I went into an Italian restaurant, I would expect a wide variety of foods. But I wouldn't (as is my main gripe with Starbuck) expect a ridiculous ritual to get it. A waiter goes with his list to the kitchen, where my food is made and brought out. They don't stick a label on the plate (usually) and tick lots of boxes before finally screwing up my order. The SYSTEM which I hate about Starbucks is precisely the fact that yes, people shouldn't expect to have to cope with 20 orders, but isn't that the problem which several people and a tick box is supposed to eleviate? An Italian restaurant would also supply cutlery which works, and a relaxing environment. Starbucks does not.
I think it is sad that when you go into a McDonalds, you are ordering by trademark names and not food types, generally. But if I wanted a hamburger that's exactly what I'd ask for, because then I wouldn't get a Big Mac, but a hamburger. Similarly, if I asked for an ice cream, I would get a McFlurry, since that's the only ice cream they do. But they call it a McFlurry anyway.
Anyway, my problem isn't with McDonalds. As for the spatula, baceria actually multiplies easier on wood, since it contains rivets in which bacteria can thrive and multiply. With steel cutlery there is nowhere for the bacteria to go, except down the plug hole when it is washed. But, once again, this wassn't my problem. My problem is that actually, the wooden sticks don't do a good job of stirring coffee, as I would expect from coffee houses, of which, living in Windsor, I actually have day to day experience of. I do like my coffee, and Starbucks coffee is quite simply average compared to other coffee houses I visit. Furthermore, they manage to do this in half the time, and are certainly "classier" establishments than the distinctly average chain that is Starbucks. |
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