I dance naked... apparently (London Dungeon)

Member Name: salem_witch

Product:	London Dungeon
Date:	30/03/06 (2767 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: A fun day out. Interesing and educational.

Disadvantages: Pricey for what it is and it doesn't take that long .

I ummed and arred about writing this review. There are already some very good reviews, which I have read on here. However, it appears that some things have changed even in the last year. So here is my shot at it.

I have always wanted to go to the Dungeons be it in London or York. I pestered my ex for ages for us to go there but he hated London so I never had the opportunity until recently. Even the reviews on here saying it wasn't worth it didn't deter me. So when a friend suggested going out for the day I jumped at the chance. He agreed to it. Before we went I took a look at the website and I must say I was excited. Sad I know!

***The Dungeons***

As I have just mentioned London Dungeon is not the only one. In fact there are 5 in total now: London, York, Edinburgh, Hamburg and Amsterdam. Amsterdam is the latest addition and only opened last year. They all have slightly different themes according to the city its in. For example, York has a section on Jorvik, which is obviously appropriate for the area. However, not all of it will be different. The Plague is covered in York, London and Hamburg. So you could go to all of them but I'd imagine it would get a bit repetitive.


***London Dungeon***

So off we went on a cold February morning. When we got there we were greeted by members of staff at the entrance. They were made up with blood on their faces and really looking the part. It is very dark as you go in and I found this disorientating at first. Then we queued to pay. There are signs up with bits of information dotted around but we didn't get a chance to read it. I'd imagine if you went at the weekend or in the school holidays you would have plenty of time to read all this though.

Paying was quick and easy enough. Then we were told to walk forward into what's best described as a holding area. There were say 30 of us waiting. We didn't have to wait long and we were told to go through to the labyrinth to get to the next bit.


***Labyrinth of the Lost***

The labyrinth is basically a maze of mirrors. It is very confusing when you go in as you can imagine. The amount of times we thought we had made it through and then we recognised something that confirmed we had been there before.

This attraction is new to London in 2005. I saw on the website that it's there till 2008. This gives the impression that they keep changing things. This can only be to encourage people to come back and see the new things that they add.

I was convinced that the room we were trying to find was hidden and then opened after a certain amount of time. Of course this is just what I think so it maybe wrong. It's a fun way of keeping everyone looking. I did get quiet annoyed though as I was sure we'd miss the guided tour. Obviously we didn't and after something like 10 minutes everyone miraculously found what we were looking for.

I've also learnt that it's the biggest labyrinth made up of mirrors. It's really hard to tell the size of it when you're in there though.


***The Great Plague***

When we all made our way out of the labyrinth we were greeted by a man all dressed up. He gave us a talk about the Great Plague of 1665 and how quickly it had spread. I say had as they talk in present tense. I can't remember any details but even if I could I wouldn't tell you as there would be no point in you going. The actors are very good and know their stuff. They are very convincing and on more than one occasion they would stop and stare at one person. This is obviously to create a scary atmosphere. I think it's the dark that made people more nervous. Throughout the whole dungeon people would creep up on you and make you jump.

There are a few things that might freak some people out. One word: rats. You are also shown a victim of the plague. This is a dead body of course. I won't tell you too much about this, again as I don't want to spoil it for everyone. All I can say is I'm glad where I stood!

***Torture Chamber***

Next is the torture chamber. One lucky lad was chosen to demonstrate a few of the torture instruments used. I think he quite enjoyed it as his mates were jeering him on. You are shown how they would be used and for what crimes they were used to punish. It makes you very glad to be born when you are.



***Traitors Gate***

For me this was the funniest bit and will explain my title a bit. You go through to Traitors Gate and they explain all the different crimes that came before a court. The guy saying all this was very good and kept a very straight face. I was unfortunate at where I stood though. I was feeling a bit unsteady on my feet so stood near the front of the mock court so I could lean against the wall. Then he started saying how some of us had been naughty and must be punished. I started thinking how this would be fun. Then he pointed at me and said 'You!' uh oh I thought. I tried looking away but it was obvious he was looking at me seeing as he was right next to me. Then he told me to get up on the stand and put to trial. Then a bloke appeared from above dressed up as an 18th-century judge. He asked my name and where I was from. He said being from Swindon was a crime enough but we'd leave that for another time! Then he started saying I was caught dancing naked in the street and I had to demonstrate it again. Of course I didn't. Then he said I was a witch but judging my friends looks I wasn't a very good one. He didn't look amused but I thought it was funny. He then accused me of dancing around a Wiccan erection. He paused and then said something like a bonfire. I can't remember exactly what he said now, as I was too busy laughing. I was really glad it was dark at this point!

After me another 2 guys were picked on. One German was accused of something (I forget!) and he got down on his knees and begged for mercy! The next guy was from India and his crime was his rather bright red anorak. We were then told the boat ride was next and anyone who didn't want to go on it could take the back passage. There were a lot of innuendos like that. We did have a few kids in the group but they didn't understand. So their parents might be getting a few tricky questions asked.

***Boat Ride To Hell***

This is another new thing to the Dungeons in 2005. It's supposed to be terrifying but it wasn't scary at all in my opinion. I can't really say a lot about it but it is supposed to give you an idea how those accused of being traitors felt when they were being taken to the Tower of London. I was grateful for the sit down though. There were a few screams so perhaps it just takes a lot to scare me!

***Jack The Ripper***

When you get off you are welcomed to the East End of London in the 1880s. Having read loads on Jack The Ripper so I knew this was the Ripper section. You are shown a video clip about who the Ripper could have been. You are also shown what he did to his victims and shown by a woman dressed up as a working girl. For all you men getting excited they wore more in those days! This bit was really interesting but I already knew most of what they were saying.

***The Great Fire of London***

The very last section is on the Great Fire of London of 1666. Again they show a short video on it. It was here I got tapped on the shoulder by an older man (who was with his wife) asking me to perform this dance. I had to laugh but his wife looked very embarrassed and gave him a warning look. I don't remember much about what they were saying about the fire if I'm honest. Whether it's because of that distraction or whether I was getting tired I don't know.


The very last thing is a tunnel you have to go through to get to the gift shop. It had bits moving around it as to give the illusion that its spinning. This made me feel really bad (I suffer from dizziness) and I wish I hadn't gone through it. Obviously this wouldn't effect everyone like this but I wish I had known about it and shut my eyes or something.

***Gift shop and cafe***

The gift shop is a reasonable size with the usual kind of thing in it. Obviously there are gruesome things which kids would love as well as the usual mugs, t-shirts etc. I didn't really look around much as I just wanted to leave and sit down somewhere. The café isn't that good. If you want a hot dog or pizza then you are ok. I got a drink from here and I remember it being over priced. The toilets are located here as well.


***Location***

London Dungeon, 28-34 Tooley Street, London SE1 2SZ, UK
The Dungeon is located underneath London Bridge. Its right next to the London Bridge underground (Northern and Jubilee lines) stop so its in an ideal place and very easy to find. There are plenty of places to eat near it as well, from McDonalds to a posh restaurant that I noticed across the road.

***Prices***

We paid £14.95 for adults and it was £11 for children. All under 5s get in free.

***So would I recommend it?***

Yes I would. It is rather expensive for what it is and the fact it doesn't take very long. We were in there for just under 2 hours. We didn't have to queue so this may take longer depending on the time of year. Despite it making me feel ill at the end I did actually enjoy it though. I can see why some people wouldn't rate it highly but I like this kind of thing. Some people may find it a bit morbid in some places and it actually does warn you that it's not for those of a weak disposition or for young children. The actors were very good and without them it would have been much duller. I won't be going back in a hurry but then its not the kind of thing that you could be entertained for the second time. I have noticed there are offers for 2 for 1 online so if you were interested in going then have a look for these offers. If you do go remember you neve know what is lurking in that dark corner!



For more information please visit www.thedungeons.com

**Please note I may not have it all in the right order and all the quotes may not be correct. My memory isn't that good!**

Summary: A good day out but a bit too expensive for what it is.