*** Christmas in SATAN'S Grotto! **** (London Dungeon)

Member Name: malibu_jenny

Product:	London Dungeon
Date:	01/01/09 (289 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Some good actors and exhibits, the rides,

Disadvantages: Queues, pushing, cramped spaces.

With The Boyfriend's little sister over from Spain for Christmas, we were searching around for something fun to do. Being 19, she was too old for Santa's Grotto, so I thought I'd hit on just the thing when I spotted Satan's Grotto at the London Dungeon. There were enticing promises on the website of spooky forests, robins roasting on an open fire and an opportunity to sell your soul to the devil in exchange for Christmas presents. Best Friend's American boyfriend was anxious to go too and she agreed to join in with the festive day trip.

ENTRANCE:

We arrived at the London Dungeon, already in the mood for some creepy fun thanks to the actors from the London Bridge experience opposite making us jump. A plastic 'spooky' snowman tethered to the railway arches seemed a remarkably un-dungeon like setting, but we entered into the freezing corridor with anticipation.

We waited and waited in a very cold queue around a fake snow scene graveyard, to have an obligatory picture taken before we could go in. At this point, we started to get a bit irritable. The guy taking the pictures kept wandering off and we didn't even want the stupid picture. Once we made it through the turnstile, there were toilets and then another massive queue. We soldiered on, but it was a working weekday at a slow time of year, if this had been peak tourist season I don't think we would have attempted it.

Entrance fees are fairly steep at £20.51 for adults and £15.95 for children. We used the 2-for-1 tickets you can get with your train travel; you can pick up a leaflet at the station (there are some at Paddington on the stand between The Body Shop and Yo Sushi) or download them at:
http://www.daysoutguide.co.uk/london-dungeon?gcli d=cnm2nnt47zccfq4i3god4ldodq
You can also save money by booking with lastminute.com or other sites such as:
http://www.365tickets.com/prodhubs.cfm/productId/ 62.

SATAN'S GROTTO:

First up was Satan's Grotto, around 30 people were ushered in and the doors closed behind us. This was hugely disappointing; with an actress dressed up as a devil in a bare room with a plastic 'dead Santa'. She asked some questions from the audience and picked on The Boyfriend for 'looking shifty' before we were rushed into the next section. The whole 'grotto' experience lasted less than 5 minutes before we moved on to the rest of the Dungeon.

THE BEST BITS:

You go through room-by-room, some with a slide show or video, some with actors and some just a badly themed holding pen for the next area. The hall of mirrors and the Sweeney Todd show in the dark were hugely entertaining and Little Sis was screaming and clinging to us all. There wasn't much in the way of history other than a short video of the fire of London and a Jack the Ripper tale (I would count the Sweeney Todd thing, but being from Spain she didn't know the background story and there was no explanation given) and no actual dungeons involved, but she really enjoyed it. In that respect it's a good antidote to museums and more cultural outings. Some of the sensationalist acting was really funny and the actors who did make the effort really livened up the experience. The light tunnel at the end of the boat ride was top notch too.

THE BOAT RIDE:

There are two rides, which we loved; first, the boat ride through Traitor's Gate. Together with a man who had two small boys with him, we made up a group of eight for the boat. The girl loading the boats was bored and impatient and each time she tried to find, for example, two people to make up a boatload they would then have to force their way through all the people packed into a very cramped queuing space. This made the whole process take forever and I think the people behind us spoke for everyone when they said they were 'really looking forward to sitting down'.

The man with the small boys looked anxious when he realised that the seats were arranged in twos. This was probably because he couldn't sit with his kids, but perhaps because he had to sit with the 'Shifty Looking Man' aka The Boyfriend. This was a mild ride however and the scenery was more atmospheric than scary. Little Sis and I were at the front, so I was concerned that we might be the ones getting wet - luckily this turned out to be the driest seats!

EXTREMIS: DROP RIDE TO DOOM:

This second ride is more intense and not suitable for pregnant women or those with back or neck complaints. As a simulated hanging, it's a pretty sick concept, but the drop itself is short enough to be fun rather than terrifying. You sit in seats with a safety bar, which are raised and then dropped back down, stopping just short of the floor. We all went on this and it was one of the highlights of the day, especially when we saw our faces on the screen afterwards.

THE WORST BITS:

The photos are an overpriced rip-off and despite making you queue forever to have the initial one taken, the staff at the photo desk aren't in the slightest bit keen to show you it. Their attitude was similar to some of the actors we encountered, one of utter tedium. I appreciate that it's probably boring doing a repetitive job as hordes of people swarm through, but it's still a job and presumably they are paid to do it.

The overcrowding and pushing to get from one room around the dungeon to the next was tiring and occasionally where there was an overlap with the last group, we were being shoved into a small space as other people were trying to get out. Access would be a problem for anyone less mobile as there are quite a few steps and narrow passages.

DO OR DON'T:

We had a great day out and I think the Dungeon is worth a visit, although not at the full price (see above for discounts). Little Sis loved every minute and we were setting off rounds of screaming by making weird noises and stroking her hair in the dark. I don't think there would be any problem with taking older children, but some of it would easily be too scary for the little ones. If you want to visit an attraction where you can walk round at your own pace and learn about London's history, this isn't it and there are plenty of better places. If you want a giggle in the dark, with some rides and a few actors to make you jump, this is an afternoon well spent.

Summary: Makes a change from a museum.