The boat race,who the fluck cares! (Rowing)

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Product:	Rowing
Date:	30/03/02 (15 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Its finished, Im here at home

Disadvantages: Wate of money, Elitists

An extremely high exuinotic Spring tide, a healthy supply of G&Ts sloshed by Britains elite,it can only be one thing down on the river,the bloody awful boat race. Expectant college types joined curious tourists as Oxbridges elite celebrated just that by racing two eights down the muddy green Thames.
I think its time to have a knock out inter university competitions now that college has been demarcated to see who really are the countries best rowers.

They did it with the football competition of the same ilk after Loughborugh had dominated it for so long. The following year it was Hackney College versus Lambeth technical college I seem to recall.
I know todays competitors are of a very high standard with ringers to assure this prestigious victory, but how cool would it be to see eight black guys from Southall poly rowing down the poshos by ten lengths.
Then we definitely couldn?t call it an anachronism too far.

So picky are these two universities that you can only row if you have ruddy red middle class cheeks, an exceedingly home counties tongue and that annoying flick of fringe all posh kids have. Cambridge though decided to do a bit of publicity seeking with some totty as the cox, who knew how to stroke those lengths and a rich kid son of, who collapsed in the final run in.
The weight of the lasses tits and the kids fathers wallet cost the light blues as they lost by half a boat length rowing into the wind.

The BBC of course have this at the top of their sporting shopping list every year because most of them want the day off to cheer their ex Oxbridge college. Notable celebs like Stephen Fry and fellow comic strip legend Hug Laurie, who raced for Oxford have been quipping all week.
Fry of course used to break wind for Cambridge before he joined the Footlights back in the seventies. Most of these boys are traditionally greased down with cooking oil and tapped with a cricket back as tradition demands.


The fastidious messing around at the start was very grating as the referee was obviously waiting for orders from the hospitality boats for the off. Apparently the drinks cabinets were getting joshed about a bit by the swell on the Jesus College tug as orders were bawled down the radio to delay .One must be comfortable before the red flag is dropped.
The ref had a lot of hard work ahead of him as the boats were glued together from start to finish. From the sure he sounded like one of those Mullahs calling for prayer, or telling of the ladies for not wearing their Burkhas.

Do we really care anymore about this pompous crap. The commentators did in Mathew Pinsett and the appropriately named Richard Balliol, which is of course the name of one of the Oxbridges most prestigious seats of learning.
Anyhow Oxford knicked it as their shortest and weakest rower gave up after the female coach took the wrong turning reading the map.
The even needed 500 police officers on overtime and 14 BBC cameras.It was the least watched syndicated BBC sports event and that network spent over two million on hospitality for this dated joust.

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