Make Me Hot Baby! (Thermals)

Member Name: huddro

Product:	Thermals
Date:	22/02/01 (139 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Keep you very warm

Disadvantages: Not a good Valentines Gift

Allow me to take you back dear reader a number of years to Valentines morning 1998. Picture the scene if you will, a young lady awakes to find her boy friend placing a breakfast tray of orange, champagne, smoked salmon and scrambled eggs, a vase with a single red rose and a card addressed to her.

Smiling they exchange a kiss and he produces a box tied with a red ribbon. Her thoughts go back a week to the Saturday night, a little tipsy, when she happened to mention that lingerie from Agent Provocateur would make her hot baby!!!

Now picture the scene 5 minutes later when she unwraps the box to discover it contains not Agent Provocateur but a pair of long johns and some hiking boots!!!!!

Well my thoughts when she said make me hot baby were with our camping trip to Wales at the end of the month!!!!

Now personally I think she was being most ungracious as these were no ordinary set of “Long Johns”, oh no, not your everyday BHS / Marks and Spencer type thermals.

These were as issued by NATO to our boys in the front line, God Bless ‘Em, when they are posted for Arctic training. These thermals were guaranteed to make her hot even at –30 degrees!!

You see these thermals were no ordinary thermals:

Brief History

Traditionally thermal underwear has been constructed of polyester, now this was a great fibre, until 1954 when Professor Guilo Natta created polypropylene which of course is the material that these thermals were constructed from.

So what is Polypropylene

Polypropylene fibre is the lightest known fibre, and has the lowest density of any fibre, thus it is 50% lighter than the equivalent polyester. The advantage of this is that the garment does not restrict movement as much as the equivalent polyester one would. (Guess who has been reading up eh?? Thanks Everwarm for the information)

Ok so why does this keep me warm?

Well to keep you w
arm first off the suit (now I am no cheap skate did I just buy the long johns? oh no I bought the fully body suit, flap and everything, well didn’t want her catching a chill!) must be a snug fit, this traps a layer of warm air against the skin. Easy eh? But I hear you say surely if I sweat through exertion I will get cold? This is wear the real beauty of this suit comes in and what we are talking about here is Wicking, wicking I hear you ask, yes Wicking!

So what is Wicking?

Imagine that each layer of fabric that this suit is constructed from has lots of tiny tiny microscopically small holes in. Now imagine that several layers of this material are squashed together but not so the holes are aligned e.g. each hole faces a solid bit of material.

Now you have a nice warm layer trapped next to your body, but you have been climbing a mountain and the perspiration is starting to form, well the movement of the layers of material cause the moisture to be sucked out through the holes so that the layer next to the body remains dry thus you don’t get cold!!

As I said earlier these were no ordinary Long Johns these were constructed of 5 layers of this polypropylene material and were guaranteed down to –30 degrees not that I could ever imagine sweating at that temperature but it is nice to know you would not catch a chill if you did.

Ok you say I am warm I am not going to catch a chill if I sweat but if they are that snug won’t the stitching rub?

Stitching

This suit is stitched using a 2-line seam that lies flat when the garment is being worn. This is different to most thermal underwear available that is stitched with a standard seam that actually stands up and creates a small ridge that can cause chafing!

So now you are warm, dry, and have suffered no chafing, feeling good so far oh yes but I hear you say what if I need to answer the call of nature?

Answering the call of
nature

Now when it is cold and we are talking very cold as a chap we have one great advantage when in the great out doors and you all know what I am talking about. For the ladies things get slightly more difficult.

This again is the advantage of this particular brand of Long John the makers have thought of everything and kindly put in two flaps on the ladies version. I do not think I need explain further.

As you can see these people have thought of everything not only are these lightweight, they wick moisture away, and you can…well you know but I hear you ask are they fashionable will I look good?

Fashion

I am not suggesting you wear these to your next-door neighbours house warming, unless it is that sort of party in which case you can invite me at the above email address!!! But the two suppliers I found do offer a range of sizes, remember you need a snug fit, and also a range of colours even patterns are available!!!!

Conclusion

When you are camping in the cold you cannot beat these for warmth and comfort. Now I am not talking wear these for a summer weekend in the Lake District this underwear is for the serious enthusiast only. Above about –5 degrees and you will find out what its like to be a turkey at Christmas……roasted!!

You can find these and other information at www.armynavyshop.com. Look for the Everwarm range.

Oh yes back to the Valentines story. Well after getting the thermal underwear back along with the hiking boots alas she was at one end of the flat me at the other and I can hear all you ladies saying good you deserve it. I did pass on the real gift of the desired underwear and a rather more romantic weekend away!

Well you have to have a sense of humour don’t you!!!

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