An orgasm, this is much better, more thrills and lasts longer! (Alton Towers (Staffordshire))

Member Name: little devil

Product:	Alton Towers (Staffordshire)
Date:	18/06/01 (260 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: brilliant day out, lots of choice

Disadvantages: queues

Alton Towers is one of the best theme parks around, although many people are put off by the price you do get what you pay for. There are so many rides to chose from you will be spoilt for choice. I have been many times and found each trip just as enjoyable and satisfying as the last. It is perfect for a family day out, or for a little adventure with your mates. I also had a fun time when I went solely with my other half, found lots of little places to sneak a kiss and had a most enjoyable time on the rides.

I have been to Alton Towers on more than one occasion and find it is the best way to part with my hard-earned cash. Being a lover of all things thrilling and dangerous theme parks are one of my favourite places to go. I found Alton Towers is best visited when the children as at school, not as much queuing and a lot less people. If you go at peak times, like the height of summer, then expect so many people you crawl not walk, and queues that go on forever. I think the longest I queued here was for the Nemesis when it first came out, a cool 3 ish hours. Ouch!

If you get caught in queues then a tip, which I found works rather well is to go around the park backwards. I know that there is no ‘right’ way to go but there is a route customers are ‘encouraged’ to take. Avoid this and go the opposite way. There will be less people wanting to get on these rides, as they haven’t got that far, and by the time you get to the beginning, and probably most popular rides, there are smaller queues.

Alton Towers is massive, and one day will be no where near enough time to do everything that you want, honest! Due to the size of the park don’t be surprised if you get lost, or like me find yourself going around in circles and seeing that same food stand way too many times!

The key thing with this theme park is that it does get very busy and so I advise getting to the park as early as you can. We always
have fun on the drive up there, families and cars do not mix well together. Especially in the smouldering heat and with wasps in the car, oh the memories are painful. But eventually you will get there. We have on occasion gone late in the afternoon, and found they would not allow us in, but the best time is as early as you can make it, well to coincide with their opening times obviously!

The first thing that will hit you is the size of the car park, it’s massive! I think they do transport to the ark but I have never used this, a good old walk is what is needed. However when you are right at the back this is easier said than done. Going in is not that bad but it is a little up hill in places on the way back.

Then you go to the little desk and give the solemn and bored looking young woman your money, in return she will hand you your ticket, to take to the gates, and a map of the park. Keep hold of this, it is vital if you and your partner wish to survive the day. The first time I went we decided a map was unnecessary, and didn’t talk for a while after that outing! The map will make sure you don’t get lost and you go to all the rides you want, not just wander going on anything, it’s too big and there isn’t enough time to do this.

Right so lets get down to the real nitty gritty, the rides! There is something that caters for all members of the family, from the young, to the old, the reserved to the thrillseeker, it will please you. The park is split up into sections, or ‘worlds’ that have a separate theme, so you can find where you are most happy.

Below are just a select few, the ones I can remember, rides in Alton Towers…

For the kids…
- The Beastie, my little sister liked this ride a lot, it’s a mini rollercoaster so the little ones don’t feel left out.

- Bouncy castle, well speaks for itself.

For the whole family…
-
Haunted House, obvious what this is, didn’t really appeal to me, but I am an action kind of girl, but one for the family I think.

- The flamingo water ride. You get in a little boat, that’s shaped like a flamingo and paddle around a lake, my sisters loved the thing we were sat in, me and the older cousin nearly ended up in the lake, but we are like brother and sister so there’s an explanation.

For the thrillseeker (my favourite lot of rides)…
- Nemesis, I loved this ride, the sensation of your dangling legs is like nothing I have experienced. Although the ride itself doesn’t last very long there are 4 seconds (ish) where you feel completely weight less, lets get the scales!

- Corkscrew – full of twists and turns, the mother of white knuckle rides always a treat, although last time I went I skipped it, there was a man sat on it fixing the track, good advertising.

- Ripsaw, this is a ride where you will get wet, I don’t know how to describe the ride, it’s one where you sit in a line and o up and down and twist around while water is squirted at you, highly entertaining.

- Oblivion, this is one of the latest and best rides, and I want to go on it again! This is the ride with the 50ft vertical drop, how’s that for adrenaline? Brilliant, even from a woman scared of heights.

- Black Hole, another ride that is well worth queuing for! With the added bonus of the dark.

I like the rides that thrill and they are exceptional in Alton Towers. The adrenaline pumps and well the experience is very orgasmic. As the title says putting the whole day together the thrills and spills of the rides is better than the average orgasm!

Eating in the park…
There are a number of places to eat and drink in Alton Towers, as you would expect with any place full of children and frustrated parents. There are burger places, chicken places etc. There will
be something to suit that craving, just be careful not to bring it back up when you go back to enjoying the rides.

Merchandise…
Some of the rides, such as Nemesis offer a whole store full of merchandise when you get of the ride. These include pictures taken of you on the ride, key rings, T-shirts etc. Not worth the money if you ask me, but I do own many photos and a key ring, bought for me not by me. There are shops all around the park where you can buy reminders of your day, it’s just like being on holiday!

How much it will cost you…
It’s roughly about £22 for an adult and £18 for a child. However prices do vary according to time of year, i.e. the busier the park is the more it will cost, and the number of people you have going. For example discounts are offered for more or one adult etc.

You can stay in the Alton Towers hotel, but I have looked into this and it costs a lot of money, extortion would be a word to describe it. I suppose if you could afford it then it would be nice, the hotel does look first class, but unfortunately my wage won’t stretch that far.

Don’t think this is just for the avid lover of rides and thrills, there is so much more to this theme park that you will be amazed, as long as you follow the easy to read maps and don’t get yourself horribly lost. There ate nice greenery that you can walk through and plants etc. So have an adventure.


All in all Alton Towers is one of the best theme parks I have been in, followed closely by ‘Parc Asterix’ in France. It offers a range of rides that will appeal to anyone and everyone. They are always updating the rides they have and so year after year you will not be bored, as if we could! It is a place for the whole family, couples and groups of mates. Definitely worth the money to get there and get in, oh and buy the pictures they take on some of the rides, very funny and great memories
!

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