The TV Channel they make you watch in Hell (Five)

Member Name: moronboy

Product:	Five
Date:	23/08/00 (39 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: makes ITV look good

Disadvantages: Everything

Grainy images, programmes of mind-numbing quality, imports that the poorest cable channels would reject - to get this franchise, someone at Channel 5 clearly had to sell the channel's soul to the Prince of Darkness and we can see how they have to pay the price.

Family Affairs? The place where ex-soap stars go to die.
The News? Tacky, plastic and lacking in any analysis or seriousness
Nature programmes? Weak, often imported, and damaged by the poor quality of reception.
Fort Boyard? Very possibly the worst British television show in history.

Decent old movies are undercut by lots of ads, the '5' logo and the fact that the channel also pumps out porn films and made-for-TV guff as if they had nothing else to show. There's a moronic emphasis on sex and nudity, as if it was Channel 5's remit to drag down the quality of British TV single-handed.

Channel 5 is not entertainment, it's a punishment. They should make people in prison watch it.

Summary: