Everyone loved the idea of Castaway 2000 didn't they? The hype in the papers, the long-awaited first episode. And to tell you the truth I was well in with that spirit - I watched every single episode for the first few weeks - the auditioning process, the first steps onto Taransay... but all this time it was dawning on me what utter tosh this is. Fascinating it may be, infuriating for me it definitely is. 'Castaway'? With a huge crate of personal belongings enabling people to bring walkmans and gameboys - it's a hard life. Castaway on a desert island... living in designer pods that wouldn't look out of place on an Alpine meadow. But all that aside, are those people just not the most irritating people in the world? I watched the auditioning process thinking 'Oh no, he won't get in, he's so argumentative and aggressive' - and ooh surprise surprise, he's in there. 'She won't get in, she has a fit if her trousers get muddy' - oh onto the island she goes. What ARE these people? Where did they get them from? One woman was going to leave the island because they were being nasty to her dog - now that's sad. But so is being nasty to a dog - if you're trying to live alone on a remote Scottish island are you really the sort of person to turn your nose up at a bit of excrement? This life is easy - it's just subsistence that's all. They seem to be on the bluddy radio every other moment if something look's like it may go wrong.

What this show should be about is survival, not petty bickering of middle-class fools. Air-conditioned pods? No, make your own fricking house out of sticks and stuff. Walkmans? Good grief. Basically, they've taken a great concept and diluted it drastically, then plugged in these various characters chosen purely on grounds of being good on TV ( contentious etc ) - it's a real shame. It could have been a really good show - but as it is I'd support a movement to get them all left there on the island. Heck, what would they do wh
en their batteries run out?