The Stupid Chuff. (Naked Chef, The)

Member Name: jatkinson100

Product:	Naked Chef, The
Date:	08/11/00 (157 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: I own a remote control.

Disadvantages: He's now on adverts as well as his own crappy TV show.

Is it just me in the world who hates Jamie Oliver, and would rather have one of his culinary creations inserted into my tightest orifice than watch the bugger cook it? So he's a cheeky, chirpy, born within the sound of Bow Bells, down to Earth geezer (Mr Burns type Uuurgh there) is he? Wants to take the posh prats out of cooking does he? So how come he's bloody loaded and thinks that cooking is a perfectly reasonable way for a man to make a living, instead of taking over his father's "barra" on the "mawkit"? I'll tell you why, 'cos he's posh, and he has loads of moolah 'cos mummy and daddy gave it to him so he didn't have to work whilst at cooking college. Don't get me wrong, I like cooking programmes, I like Ready, Steady, Cook for instance, but don't get me started on dropping the lovely Vern for that complete (salad-)tosser Ainsley. I like cooking myself, and eating, and watching other people cook, but not this 'Mockney' prat who spat the plums out of his mouth to use in a crappy pudding with ingredients so obscure you couldn't find them outside of Harrods or Jamie's private Sainsburys. The guy has got no more than a soupson (is that how you spell it?) of Buffalo Motzerella for a brain, a family so annoying I'd rather live next door to Tony and Cherie Blair, and friends who, if I saw on fire, I would rather have my bladder explode than,... well, you know.

I HATE JAMIE-BLOODY-OLIVER AND HIS FAMILY AND HIS BIRD AND HIS HOUSE AND HIS MATES AND HIS SCOOTER AND HIS OLIVES AND SAINSBURYS FOR GIVING THE IGNORANT GIT EVEN MORE BLOODY MONEY.

And how come he has to ask some woman in a supermarket "are they olives?". He is paid a massive ammount of cash for little work and doesn't even know what a bloody olive looks like. Imagine if Handy Andy asked some guy in B & Q "Is that MDF?", or if Carol Vorderman asked a contestant on Countdown "Is t
hat a Curly 'K' or a kicking 'K'?" She'd be laughed out of town.

And Buffalo Motzerella has BSE, well, maybe.

Summary: