Behrly Watchable (Saturday Show, The)

Name: stoffy

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Product:	Saturday Show, The
Date:	15/02/02 (291 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: there is something better on the other side

Disadvantages: Dani 'where's the autocue' Behr

Going, going, GOING LIVE! Oh, the days of Sarah Greene when she was famous, and Phil Schofield when he didn't have to use 'Just For Men'. There was Trev and Simon, and swearing at Five Star. Amusing features and boy-bands in stonewashed denim. Even cookery features (see, it's educational as well as entertaining!).

The replacement was Live and Kicking, which ran successfully with Andi (Peters, now head of T4) and Emma (Forbes, probably now washing up for her Mum, now Nanette Newman?s hands are wrinkly rather than soft). Then there was Zoe (Ball, daughter of insane mathmatician, wife of DJ) and Jamie (Theakston, off those nostalgia programmes). It all slid downhill with a whole load of no-hopers, and so the BBC decided to replace it with an 'all new' rival to ITV1's SM:TV.

The ingenously named 'Saturday Show' (Wonder how many exec meetings it took to come up with that one?), began life on air several months ago. So, who else do you get to rival the wit and charm of McPartlin, Donnelly and Deeley (the then line-up of SM:TV)? Er, Dani Behr... She must have a bloody good agent to have got so far on so little. Apparently reading her lines off a batak wall (watch her eyes next time you tune in...), Behr's monotone airhead in tweenager clothes was an interesting choice for a ratings grabber. The eternally 26 Ms Behr once presented 'The Word' and once, during a famously heated discussion between Mark Lamarr and Shabba Ranks (Ranks had just declared death on gay people), Behr famously interjected 'let's change the subject to something more cheery - it's almost Christmas!'. Of course, it was the beginning of November at the time...

The other presenters are Joe Mace (comic value, allegedly) and the other muppets Tiny and Mr Duk. A bit like Zig and Zag, only much more peturbing...

The format of the show is the usual kids fodder. Cartoons (not as recognisable as Po
kemon), Quizzes (not as famous as Challenge Ant), viewer comps (not as memorable as Wonkey Donkey) and S Club 7, the jewel in a crown of thorns.

The ratings aren't doing too well, and all the guests are always on SM:TV or CD:UK anyway. The problem with the show is, well, all of it. There is nothing about it that isn't done better on SM:TV. Behr has always been and will always be a bad presenter, and letting her loose on a live kids show is probably the dumbest thing that the BBC has done since letting Vanessa have her own literature game show.

The BBC has a page dedicated to the show, which can be found at www.bbc.co.uk/saturdayshow. This includes revelations such as Dani describing what her worst ever haircut was. (For those who care, it was very thick with a short fringe - cheers for that Dan!), and previews of who's on the next show (usually alternating between Mis-Teeq and Blue, and whoevers got the major 'teen' story on 'Eastenders').

There is also a band which plays at the end of the show. Called 'Stamford Amp', they are a cross between the Dum Dums and Big Fun. It ain't pretty. I think their stylist must have had creative urges after sticking their wet fingers into an electrical socket. At least their keeping Brylcreem in business...

Unbelievably, there is also a text service, where you pay £1 for the privilege of the programme sending you messages about what's coming up in future weeks. Surely it should be the show paying the kids for receiving these junk SMS's... I think that this is a bit cheeky, especially considering the age of the viewers the show is targeted at.

I'm probably far too old to be commenting on this subject now, but I'm sure it was better in the good old days. Why don't they bring back Sarah Greene? She could probably do with the money to build a next loft conversion or something. And Phil Schofield? Well, have you
seen the prices of hair dye these days?

My prediction for the show is that it will be dropped like a hot spud. Then the BBC will have to find something else to replace it with. I know the numbers of two presenters...

For those who care, 'The Saturday Show' is on BBC 1 on Saturdays between 9am and 12pm.

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