I Want To Be On Your Show Trisha (Trisha)

Member Name: DaisyDuck

Product:	Trisha
Date:	09/11/01 (1798 review reads)
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Trisha a show copying the format of many American shows such as Ricki, Sally Jessy Raphael, Montel Williams and of course Jerry Springer. Members of the public are invited to air their problems, families and arguments in front of an audience. The host Trisha is there to ask leading questions, dole out advice and invite the audience to do the same. The main problem with this is that many of the guests only want to promote themselves and come up with ludicrous stories to get themselves TV exposure. Couple that with a few people in the audience who are also into self promotion, and get themselves noticed by starting slanging matches, and you have a show that makes me cringe.

I have read some excellent opinions on the Trisha show , some for, some against, and even a wonderful confession by a former guest. I very rarely watch the show as I find it far from entertaining and sometimes embarassing to watch, but it must have some good points as it does pull in enough viewers for ITV to screen it. I would like to give my view of the show in the form of a telephone call, made by a would be guest to a researcher for the programme.

Hello is that the Trisha Show? Yeah I want to be a guest and tell Trisha and everyone about myself.

Which Show? Well it doesn't really matter as long as its not one of the boring ones. You know the ones I mean, sometimes Trisha talks to people with real concerns about things like adoption, depression, addiction well I don't want to be on one of those shows, unless it's sex addiction, thats always a good laugh.

About myself. Well I'm fifteen years old and I have two kids, I live with my Mum and her boyfriend, my Dad and his girlfriend and my three little brothers.
Yeah we all live together, Dad and his girlfriend only moved in recently though.

My kids, well H is eighteen months and Faye is three months. Their Dad? Well H's dad is my uncle Clint, thats right my mums brother. Yeah I am
sure that he would come on a show about incest, thats if we can find him. He is in hiding at the moment, not sure why, something about him being a paedophile whatever that is.

Faye's dad, thats my current boyfriend. He is fifty works at a canning factory in Spalding. He's a bit boring really, the only interesting thing about him is the stalking. Yeah thats right he's a stalker. Ainsley Harriot thats who he stalks. Why? Well he really wanted to stalk Kylie Minogue but she's a bit little to see and she goes abroad a lot. Thats right Ainsley is huge and he is always around, if my boyfriend is too busy to go to London to stalk him, he does it by watching Ready, Steady, Cook.

My Mum. Well she is thirty nine, about eighteen stone and works as a kissogram. Yeah she does all the stripping and other bits as well, her most popular routine, something with a bottle of Mr Muscle bathroom spray and a cheese grater. The unusual thing about her is that she is a compulsive cleaner, she vacumns the carpets every day.

My Dad. He has just come back to live with us, well he used to do something big that involved him having a lot of wives, yeah thats it bygamy. Anyway Mum said he could come and stay with us until he recovers from his operation. Yeah sex change, he calls himself Melissa and looks a bit like Patsy from Absolutely Fabulous, except for the tattoos on his arms from when he was in the Merchant Navy. No he has a girlfriend, now he's a girl as well, does that make him a lesbian?

Friends. I've got all the right kind to come on the show. Some will stand up and slag off me or any of my family, some to come on and say I am great despite having slept with all their boyfriends, and even some who will claim that my Dad got them pregnant after having changed sex to a woman.

You think we sound ideal, but have we been on TV before? Well we have only been on Trisha five times this year, Kilroy four, and Gerry Springer ha
s flown us out to America twenty three times now. Yeah, we have a supply of strange clothes, sunglasses and wigs, so that will be fine then.

Oh I nearly forgot Grandad, yeah he's just starting out. He does a striptease, just down to his socks and suspenders, age ? about seventy I think.
Grandma? Well only if you can do a live broadcast from a top security prison. Well she runs a B&B and one of the guests found out she was making the muesli go further by adding the used wood shavings from the gerbils cage to it. No she wasn't put in prison for that. She suffocated the bloke who complained about the muesli with her bloomers, yeah she was still wearing them at the time.

Oh thankyou, so I can expect a courier to bring round the train tickets to Norwich, and you will arrange the Hotel for us.

That's great we haven't been on telly at all so far this week.

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